In the gulag that Seth has us working in, we have a beating chamber. It’s the one small mercy of my life at 2oceansvibe. When I’m relieved of my duties as a human coffee table (after meetings), I go back to the beating chamber, where I get to break microwaves, furniture and sunglasses from rival brands – with a diamond-encrusted hammer.

Seth is such a kind master. He understands that sometimes you need to blow off steam.

Anyway, Seth evidently told the Dear Leader about it at their Sunday Brunch, and he obviously blabbed to Hu Jintao, as he’s prone to do. And all of a sudden Beating Chambers have been syndicated in malls across China, except they’re for women only, and you have to spend a minimum of 38 yuan (about R35) at the mall to gain free entry.

CLICK HERE to smash stuff

First it was Green Market Square, and now it’s the V&A Waterfront.

Yes, ladies and gents, we’re talking about free Wi-Fi.

We recently ran a story on Skyrove’s offering of free Wi-Fi in Green Market Square, Cape Town. Things have developed ever so slightly.

Read the rest of this entry »

As the eyes of the world turn to Africa, 2oceansvibe Radio and The Cape Quarter Lifestyle Village have combined to bring a world first to Cape Town.

2oceansvibe Radio will be broadcasting purely internet radio, live and around-the-clock, from retail space within the Cape Quarter – allowing the general public to watch and interact with the radio hosts and celebrity guests.

Watch that space!

As suggested in a recent BizCommunity article, 2oceansvibe Radio will be taking it’s current broadcasting activities to the next level, as the demand for this type of format is nothing short of overwhelming, with listeners tuning in at work, home and even in their cars. More on that here.

The decision for 2oceansvibe Radio to move into the Cape Quarter was an easy one. The flirting began nearly a year ago (here) and, with the centre’s exclusive upmarket vibe and location, the fit was too perfect to ignore!

Stay tuned for official launch date..

In the meantime, as we prepare, be sure to catch us every Friday at www.2oceansviberadio.com live from 08h00 to 10h00. Click here to find out about how to listen in your car.

Yesterday was exactly one year since we published the now famous Cape Town Waterfront iStore article. To celebrate this milestone, we checked our Google stats and noted that that particular post is in the Top 20 most read articles on 2oceansvibe (ever!), with close on 8,000 views in the last 12 months (currently 7,675 visits)! It was narrowly pipped by the Portofino Restaurant article.

This obviously has a lot to do with the fact that the article comes in Google’s Top 5 for the search phrases, “cape town istore,” “cape town apple mac,” and “waterfront istore” (among others). As a result, 3,880 people have found the article in Google search results – without going through 2oceansvibe. ie. they went directly to the article from Google.

No apologies..

Because of this very high ranking for such broad search phrases, the comments section never really dies, and has so far received  153 comments! Wowsers – that’s a lot of interactivity and a helluva a long time and excessively high stats and figures, for a company to not respond. No, they never did. Nor did they attend to the copious amounts of people moaning in the comments section – the perfect forum to fix problems and tend to customer complaints.

Surely that must be some kind of record? You know, in terms of companies that don’t give a toss?

Be sure to check some of the most recent comments, including the one about their employees advising customers to rather buy their equipment at the shop next door.

Stunning – absolutely stunning!

Here’s to the next 12 months!

See you at Digicape.

I was really stoked when I found this pack of magic in the Big Blue shop in Kalk Bay this weekend. As some of you will be aware, drinking alcohol on Camps Bay beach and all other public beaches in Cape Town is prohibited. And whilst some of you have taken to making pre-mixed drinks and cocktails served in plastic cups, there is an even easier method for the beer drinkers out there.

Please appreciate “Hide-a-beer” :

Drink beer without fear of being arrested

It’s a pack of stickers displaying tame cool-drink looking brands, which you stick on your beer can to avoid detection. It wraps around perfectly!

How stunning is that?

“Diet Wow” is just one brand they used – wait until you see the others!

In the space of one week, not one but two 2oceansvibers out there noticed that Pick n Pay Express stores are the latest outlets to offer Ass Flavoured foods. This, just a month after Fruit & Veg City jumped on the Ass Flavour bandwagon, with their ass flavoured subs and wraps.

With ass cupcakes going big in Hermanus and Woolies preferring ass flavoured quiche (lest we forget Spar’s genius “ass rolls” offering, it was only a matter of time before ass flavoured muffins hit the shelves. So hats off to Pick ‘n Pay for spotting the gap in the market, and taking it.

Well done, guys. Absolute master stroke!

Check out the other stories and examples of how ass flavoured foods are taking over South Africa here!

[thanks luca, chris]

So I was leaving Cavendish Square on Friday after a thoroughly enjoyable Chunky Chicken Wrap at Sumo, which was preceeded by an awesome session Guest Speaking to the UCT Business Science Honours students. A good day, all in all..

That was until I drove out of the Cavendish Square car park.

I joined the spiral exit on the one end of the car park, after waiting for a gap to enter the stream. The car that was coming down from above had more than enough room but decided to accelerate, once I had started to join the flow. Oh dear, one of those..

Needless to say the hooter began blaring behind me and this “woman” starting screaming like a Goddamn banshee. This terribly un-ladylike behaviour, combined with her general pronunciation and accent, led me to believe that she was not of royal descent.

Rather, I would tend to suggest that she was a tad unrefined – possibly coming down from a hangover.

After the video I drove at 3km/h down about 5 levels. Even though my window was shut, she carried on like a bloody fish wife the WHOLE way! Terribly amusing.

But not nearly as amusing as the fact that the one line she kept on repeating over and over again was, “Look at YOU, Driving MOMMY’S CAR!!”

Given that I have entered my thirties and happen to own the Mercedes Benz I was driving, it is somewhat ironic that she was giving me a double-compliment. Not only do I look young enough to be a student, but my car seems to be quite impressive as well.

Thanks!

I’ve only really been compelled to break out into song in the Sea Point Spar, home to thousands upon thousands of overseas models living in the area. Not to mention Luba Shumeyko’s twin (damnit!) sister, who often shops in the very same store. They practice their ramp walks down the isles, as we, mere mortals, watch on. Only then have I been driven to the near-point of song.

Not this lot, who launched into a seemingly impromptu musical in the fruit isle of an American grocery store.

You’ll enjoy this.

I dare you to rock that vibe at the Kloof Woolies..

[thanks paul]

Really? Well suck me sideways!

I gotta be honest, it doesn’t get much easier to find deals around Cape Town. My boys at www.nobucks.co.za have absolutely NAILED IT with their website which documents where and when various booze and food specials are going on around Cape Town. I simply clicked today’s date and it gave me a list of various promotions running at different establishments around the Mother City.

These are tough times, my friends – don’t be shy to box smart..

www.nobucks.co.za

Go to www.nobucks.co.za and click the calendar and scroll through the list. It really is disgusting how easy they’ve made it! Something inside me tells me that it shouldn’t be this easy.

But we’ll just ignore that vibe.

You’ll see the 2oceansvibe logo while you’re there. That’s because the service they are providing encourages the art of “Living The Holiday.”

Get in there.

Enjoy it.

Oh my God! You.are.going.to.plutz!

Louis Vuitton have announced the launch of a new women’s gifts catalogue with a romantic twist – just in time for Valentine’s Day! The timing couldn’t be better – I mean it’s one thing knowing where you will be spending Valentine’s Day, but what does one buy? Now that’s a different story!

Check it out out out:

“The Louis Vuitton Valentines 2010 Catalog for men and women includes the ultimate and elegantly unique gift ideas to celebrate any relationship on almost every budget.”

Now you’re speaking my language!

Come on, girls – let’s have a little squizz, shall we? Let’s covet these objects together:

I know! How divine?!

It’s been a while since I popped into the Cape Town Louis Vuitton store on the V&A Waterfront’s Death Row.

Can’t wait!

[source:bornrich]

Ok look, they’ve made this rap song and it’s so damn good I actually don’t know what to do with myself.

I’ve sent you to the People of Walmart website before (boom). But now they’ve taken the best of the best from that website and turned it into a rap song. And it’s good. Trust me, I know what I’m doing. This is A-grade stuff which I consider my own private stash.

Ja, you get me.

Last guy I let use it died.

THAT’S how good it is. And I want you to try it.

It’s too funny.

I’ll pay a grand to have that on repeat in the back of my mind for the rest of time.

[thanks greg]

We’ve chatted about these guys before – Luxury4Less – the guys who sell limited stock discounted luxury items online. They got 500 signups on the first day and those of you who did it will know why.

With Christmas around the corner, I can’t not tell you about deals on luxury goods – I mean, for God’s sake – that’s how you roll, right?

They’ve been pretty clever with their website. Check it out..

Luxury4Less gets into the Christmas spirit with smoking hot babe

Besides giving us the sexiest Santa I’ve yet to see, they gone and created two easy “must have” lists – Top 10 Gifts For Him and Top 10 Gifts For Her.

Some of my favourites from the guy’s gifts:

3pc Shave Set
Because you’re posh..

Up until now, you probably had no idea
that you could own your very own Beer Dispenser!

The much desired “presto” machine
Find your inner barista!

The “Biltong King” biltong maker
Are you man enough?

Pretty cool, right?

There’s tons more other stuff, so get in there and check it out.

Whoops! I nearly forgot about the angels! Well, besides kitchenware including the Tempo Supreme Slow Cooker and Givenchy fragrances, they’ve got these 9kt gold handmade trilogy style pierced drop earrings..

9kt gold with 30% discount..

They’re enjoying close to 30% discount and there is only one pair left (at the time of this article going out). Hmmm, who’s gonna be the lucky angel..

Good luck, baby shoes!

Remember that they offer select membership, but have arranged a special system for 2oceansvibers.

All you have to do is go to the website HERE and put in your details, followed by this promotional code 2oceans@luxury4less.co.za

I received the following invite from Puma, essentially giving me carte blanche to do whatever I want in their V&A Waterfront store from 19h00 to 21h00 tomorrow (Tuesday) night. They’re giving me a 45% discount, which I am able to extend to you. And that’s not for sale items – that’s includes NEW STOCK! Not the worst vibe to go for just before Christmas!

I’m not sure if they realised that Wednesday was a public holiday… Naturally, I’ll be taking things to the next level..

Haaaah! Did you see that? They used words like “free reign” and “do whatever you want!!” I mean, really, it’s in black & white, right?

Yes, it is.

That’s why I made some calls and am turning this into a very brief, very exclusive 2oceansvibe party for YOU. I’ve arrange a DJ (DJ Sox, no less) with high-powered sound and apart from this 45% discount on ALL Puma gear, there will also be FREE Jack Black Beer, FREE De Grendel wine, FREE Pussy Natural Energy Drink and, while we’re at it, I got the geniuses at Thirst Bar Services to pull round and fill in the gaps with cocktails and other beautiful concoctions!!

With South Africa’s most exclusive mobile bar service, Thirst, 2oceansvibe’s top beverage brands, our favourite DJ, and virtually half price off all PUMA gear, I couldn’t think of a better way to welcome the Wednesday public holiday! (Let alone Christmas!)

Can you?

No, you can’t.

Make sure you get there!

HOW DO YOU WIN ACCESS TO THIS RIDICULOUS EVENT?

COMPETITION CLOSED

To the people who posted the first 100 comments below, see you there – Tuesday 15th December, Puma Store, V&A Waterfront. From 19h00 to 21h00..

And by a “joke” I mean it’s “off the charts.” So much so that it’s silly.

I tell you what, between Apple products and these guys, life couldn’t be easier.

David, the owner of Caprice gave me no option but to attend a party at Caprice on Saturday night last week. And off I went. Or rather, the crew and I were fetched in one of those ridiculously over-the-top limos with neon lights inside and lazers and DVD screens. In a word?…ludicrous.

Very kak sunset that night..

Keep on rolling baby, you know what time it is..

But that didn’t mean it wasn’t fun. Make no mistake, it’s in another league to the ones they use for matriek balls – with dried body fluids knotting the deep pile carpets. No, no – this one was good clean fun! So we got out of the thing at Caprice and there were camera’s and microphones and all sorts of shit. I think there was also a red carpet. What exactly was going on, I don’t know. Something to do with Jamesons. Either way, we got a stunning table in the 20’s (know your Caprice table numbers, people) and the booze arrived.

The booze was consumed and more came. I stretched out my arm to show Hanneli a photograph on my iPhone and….whoops, the motherfucker fell into an ice bucket. An ice bucket with melted ice in it..

i.e. water. (sometimes you have to spell it out)

Photo taken just before the incident
We were marveling at that angel’s short jean pant.
We approved..

Now you know when there is an emergency and someone is about to die and everyone in the room freezes? Ja, it was like that. I whipped it out and started shaking it.

WATER was coming out of it.

“MY CHIIIIILD!!!!” I screamed, looking up to the heavens, arms outstretched.

“Oh, Jesus, God noooooo,” I pleaded, as The Muse rubbed my back, explaining to those around that whathadjusthappened was very much equal to the loss of a loved one. To me.

I drank the pain away and the next day I called Digicape, who told me what I knew already – about the guys that operate in secret, somewhere near to Mabu Vinyl . They have to be near to Mabu Vinyl, because Mabu Vinyl is where you deliver the thing AND where you pick it up – virtually ALWAYS fixed. I remember using them once before for an iPod which had a dead battery.

No-one SEES these people that fix the things. All you get is an invoice at the end from “iFix iPod Repairs.” Their logo is an oldschool iPod (chunky) with “iFix” on the screen.

I lOVE that vibe. They’re holed up inside some kind of Safe House nearby, where all they do is fix iPods and iPonies and anything that starts with an “i.” There are rumours that they use a team of abused Cambodian children who have no other option but to fix iPods. Apparently they live on memory chips, so it all kind of works out fine. But no-one has photographic evidence, so it can’t be true.

Either way, it’s very cool.

So anyway, let’s get back to the story. Let’s look at this in order of events..

I dropped the iPhone into the ice bucket on Saturday night.

On Sunday the screen was blank and it had dried a bit. I plugged it into my very sexual Macbook Pro, looking for a miracle and SOMEHOW the Macbook managed to talk to the iPhone and it synchronised…

I don’t know exactly what it did, but I took the iPhone to these guys on Monday.

I hacked my way through the week with your classic “piece of shit” phone and then, on Thursday, I got an email telling me it was FIXED. It had to be completely wiped as well but, you know, collateral damage is a reality.

Very naughty.

I picked it up on my way to the Invictus premiere which I attended with The Adventurer (Ryan Scott) who stars in the movie as ex-Springbok Brendon Venter. Whatever, you know – standard stuff. Big Tommy Boyd was there. What a beautiful man.

I left home with my laptop and, on my way to the movie premiere, the phone and the laptop made love.

They had a little baby and the baby was IDENTICAL to the one I thought I had lost. EVERYTHING was there. The contacts, the calendar, the photos, the music. Absolutely everything. Even the front screen wallpaper was there.

And here’s proof that everything is back to normal. Taken tonight. Morgan Freeman, throwing a very cool vibe at the premiere..

Morgs – going for it.

And that was that!

Oh, the movie?

Very good. Watch it. Trust me. I got quite into and even, dare I say, emotional.

And for anything to do with fixing you iPod, check out their website www.ifixipods.co.za for contact details etc.

There is a saying I made up a few years ago when I used to smuggle my cat, Homer, through customs. I used to tell my friends, “Don’t let the cat out the bag.” Since then, it’s use has slowly evolved and now people use it as an actual saying. They mainly use it to describe the revealing of a secret or a surprise.

An example of an actual cat being let out of a bag

So right now I’m going to let “the cat out the bag” about something I bought for someone. I’m not sure if they got it yet, but I can’t help telling you about it, because it’s a beautiful thing and you need to know about it.

Cape Town’s social circuit will know that the queen bee, Marina, from The LIttle Black Book, recently had a beautiful baby boy, Luc. Obviously with these kind of things, it’s quite tricky with regards to visiting times. Is she back from the hospital yet? Do they want visitors? Etc. etc.

That’s why I decided to take my mouse for a stroll down to the Woolies website yesterday. Now, being a premium quality SA brand, 2oceansvibe is no stranger to Woolworths, and we’ve recently indulged in their web vibe (let alone their steamy jeans ad – Gee whizz, Woolies! On the edge, hey?).

They seem to have updated their website since I last went – and have now included these “hampers.” They show up on the main page (bottom left) and, when clicked, it actually takes you to a seperate website – JUST for the hampers!

Just trust me when I tell you that www.woolieshampers.co.za will make you a rock star, for doing absolutely nothing. Please enjoy the first hamper I saw on the page (no spice – you can see for yourself here):

Are you joking?

The headline for that hamper was “A new baby boy“ and apparently includes:

cuddly teddy bear (nice)
soft, anti-pill polar fleece baby blanket (great)
machine washable bibs (thank heavens for that!)
earth friendly natural baby cream and baby powder (I’ll take that)
celebratory sparkling grape juice (whoo-hoo!)
1 memento iced duck biscuit nougat treat (fine)

“Oh, for God’s sake!” I said to myself, as I realised how ridiculously easy this all was.

Next to it was “A new baby girl.“ And then it just spiraled. “Snack Hamper” was the next one. Then “Mad hatter’s tea party,” “Nibble and braai,” “Coffee and chat,” “Festive treats” and so on, and so on, and so on. Check them all out here.

Did you enjoy the name of that one? Coffee and a chat! Haaaah! That’s hilarious! It’ll fly of the shelves in the Southern Suburbs, I tell you what; as the bored housewives kill time before picking up their daughters at Herschel.

*cough* That’s obviously after the pool boy has left.

I’ll let you know what Marina says, but it’s obviously going to be a hit and I’ll be ranked as “awesome.” For what? For a click here and a click there. Please…it’s too easy. It’s basically just all a big joke.

With the NIGHTMARE that is festive season shopping, I’ve got my eye on this very cheeky little Festive Treats Christmas Hamper…

Shame, that’s difficult to click..

I might just blast that through to a few people and earn a lifetime supply of brownie points while I’m at it.

Hmm.. now who has been behaving..

CLICK HERE to be awesome from the comfort of you own desk.

I know what you’re thinking. How can it get to this level? It’s quite silly, really – it’s like we’re playing this game on “easy” mode..

Behold, the ULTIMATE Christmas gift..

Due to the overwhelming amount of awesome videos on 2oceansvibe, you can’t be expected to watch it all – and let’s face it, not everyone has super fast internet. So here it is, people. You asked for it, and now you’ve got it. It’s the 2009 2oceansvibe DVD.

Not surprisingly, it’s entitled “Touch Yourself” and contains SO MUCH stuff I honestly don’t know where to begin. What’s more, they’re all presented in their original resolution, so you’re getting improved picture quality too!

Just to get you started, it’s basically got the ENTIRE 2oceansvibe Weathergirls Show collection (shame – poor you), with models including The Cowley Sisters, Tracy McGregor, Lyndall Jarvis, Genevieve Morton and tons more beautiful angels. And that’s not excluding the ones with Helen Zille and Goldfish and the other one with Bob Skinstad stripping down to his jocks! Some classic moments, I must admit!

But that’s not all..

Howz that DVD box? Pretty cool, hey? Can you imagine owning that and holding it close to your body? No need – just pop it in the DVD player and, when you watch it, it will feel like I am right there, holding you. Naked.

It’s also got the ENTIRE Pauly Shore series with Dirty Skirts soundtrack that we shot in Hollywood early on in the year – which includes Pauly Shore dry humping Zinzi on a physio’s table. Let alone live footage of Pauly making hotel booty calls and following through with the angels actually arriving at the door within minutes! Those who have watched the whole thing will confirm that it is truly hilarious! And I didn’t even mention the hidden-camera footage of Pauly in the drug store..

OBVIOUSLY it’s got the IDOLS Randall Abraham “Rocky” video which won the award for Best Blog Post at the 2009 SA Blog Awards. That same video has been watched online over 150,000 times so far. I simply couldn’t leave it out!

It’s got the little debate I had with Springbok Captain, John Smit, as well as the 2oceansvibe Top Billing feature which included Goldfish, as well as Ard Matthews from Just Jinjer on the show.

So it’s a bit of a joke when it comes to the volume of stuff you’re getting on the DVD. There’s even a Bonus footage section which includes the now famous Cape Town Short Cuts video, as well as behind the scenes never-seen-before footage of The TBG, Seth, The Dude, G-Man and the rest of the gang. I would tell you more, but don’t want to spoil it..

I had someone the other day tell me that they would pay R250 just for copies of all the weather girls. Well, Thomas, there will be no need! Because you can get EVERYTHING I have just mentioned AND MORE for just R100. That’s what a lot of people give car guards these days.

No surprises there – we’ve gone and made it too easy for you again.

It’s basically just all a big joke.

I cannot imagine a better Christmas present. It costs you nearly nothing and, at the same time, it might just save someone’s life. If you’re smart you’ll buy one for every person you’ve ever met in your life.

Do yourselves a favour and CLICK HERE (or the disc above) to go straight to the Diletto website, which is where you will be able to buy it right now, online baby!

And can you believe that the price includes a signed picture of Seth in the Karate-Kid “Crane” pose? Taken during the “Randall Abrahams ‘Rocky’ Video.”

Well it does.

All inclusive..

*The DVD will also be available to hire from all branches of DVD Nouveau.

*5% of all proceeds go to the MyLife Foundation

CLICK HERE TO BUY DVD

We’ve covered the phenomenon of “ASS” flavoured foods on 2oceansvibe for quite some time ( see Spar’s ass rolls here, Pick n Pay’s parmalat ass here, Woolworths quiche ass here).

I’m pleased to say that the acquired taste of ass in foods is spreading up the coast, having now hit the Spar in Hermanus.

Excellent!

Check it out – Ass Cups…

Ass flavoured cup cakes..

Now available at the Hermanus Spar

That’s brilliant!

With a picture a person on the top of it!

I would assume that is the person whose ass they used? How can we be sure?

Weird, you’d think they’d use one ass for the whole whole batch.

[thanks tara]

Sometimes the prizes are so big on 2oceansvibe that you don’t believe it’s true. That’s fair enough – I pinch myself on a daily basis. And so did our latest winner Nicola Duncan (along with list creator – yours truly) when she found herself at Canal Walk last week, claiming her thirty grand’s worth of prizes, courtesy of Old Mutual’s new Investment Card!

Plasmas, Playstations, Digital photo frames, video cameras, holidays..
YOU NAME IT!

To recap – Nicola won:

WHY did they do this, you ask?

According to Old Mutual,

“If our winners had bought these products with an American Express® Old Mutual Investment Credit Card, a sum of R1041.54 would have been invested into a money market unit trust!

Remember, the new Investment Credit Card Account from Old Mutual allows you to invest, every time you spend. If you need any further information about this account, or would like to apply for one, please visit www.oldmutual.co.za/card.”

That’s absolutely fair enough!

Check out this vid I put together as I joined Nicola to claim the prizes

Now what has this taught you?

Quite simple.

You ready?

Enter ALL the 2oceansvibe competitions!

If you don’t, you’ll NEVER win.

FACT!

[*Video soundtrack is "Window Shopper" by The Parlotones]

Don’t say I don’t tell you how and when to be at the right place at the right time.

I was contacted by the owner of an online company called luxury4less who have launched a very exclusive website offering a vast range of premium brands and designer products at massively reduced prices. But it’s not what you think – give this a moment..

This is a genuinely clever concept that I’ve seen overseas and, in particular, the U.K. where I know of a few friends who indulge. You see they have limited quantity of each product, which allows them to achieve massive discounts.

They’re pretty up front with how the whole things works. You’ll get the idea once you’ve read this:

Firstly, all our products are genuine, the real stuff, guarantees and warranties are provided, where applicable, and we also guarantee a 100% return policy (T&C apply) in case we deliver the wrong item. Discounts are negotiated with our suppliers, and offered to our members since the products offered in our campaigns might be off-season (or close to off-season) products, overstock, slow moving items, or, a new product the supplier would like to test in the South African market as part of a promotion.

Fair enough. Nice vibe. I gave it a bash today and I’m happy to say the system works perfectly. I used my login (after receiving approval) and, with the dwindling supply of smellies at home, I checked out the fragrances.

Case in point, The Hugo Boss Energise fragrance that I was perving at the airport on my way back From L.A. in July.

Due to the massiveness of the price reduction (40% off), there were only 3 in stock and the countdown clock (yes, there is a countdown clock) had 14 days to go. The price was set at R399 (rather than R660) and I’d be damned if I’d let this puppy slip through my fingers! I mean, seriously – R399? Those of you who buy premium fragrances will know that deals on fragrances should not be ignored. There is one rule – just get it – quickly – before it disappears.

So ja, that’s that – I bought mine and it’s on it’s way. But don’t panic – once those are gone, there are some others to go for – not that I can put my cock on a block that they will still be there when you get there!

Enjoy this screenshot, featuring everything from Lacoste and Joop! to Moschino and Happy Fizz:

And those aren’t all of them!

What’s more, fragrances are just ONE of the product lines they have. Don’t even get me started on the sunglasses, gym equipment, holiday packages, bags, plasmas and more.

Seriously – everything is RADICALLY discounted – you’d be silly not to have a squizz.

I explained to the owner of the website that 2oceansvibers should be allowed membership and shouldn’t have to go through a screening process – so he agreed and gave me a special 2oceansvibe promotional code for you guys to give you immediate access!

So go to the website HERE and put in your details, followed by this promotional code 2oceans@luxury4less.co.za

Go on, give it a little click – they will have something you want and it will cost next to nothing – www.luxury4less.co.za

I am overly impressed with the vibe being thrown by the new Cape Quarter, in the de Waterkant neighborhood of Green Point. Do yourself a favour and do a little fly-by along Somerset Road, opposite the BP (who are upgrading their shop to include some new kind of Pick ‘n Pay express vibe – much needed).

The all new Cape Quarter “Extension”
Generally quite stunning..

Dubbed, the “Cape Quarter ‘Extension,’” this is what their website tells us:

Cape Quarter ‘Extension’

The Cape Quarter ‘Extension’ is now open.

In keeping with the lifestyle theme, Cape Quarter ‘Extension’ enhances the village environment. Patrons can enjoy the convenience and security of this self-contained lifestyle building, with Jarvis Street serving as the link between the current Cape Quarter and the ‘Extension’.
Upmarket boutique stores focused on décor, design, furniture, fashion, food, and entertainment makes this destination one of a kind.

[check out their website here]

I think a little round of applause is in order?
Well done, guys, looks good so far.
Let’s just hope the service compliments the facade of the building.

I’ve never really had more than five positive visits in a row to the Camps Bay “Friendly” store and am surprised that I still visit the place, let alone get worked up about the shoddy service, stock take and queue times. If anything, they get an “A” for consistency.

Last Sunday was no different.

The Camps Bay Friendly Store

The Muse and I felt the urge for a fizzy drink and I drove down from The Safe House to buy a Coke and a Stoney. I side-swiped the bottled foods isle to see if they had re-stocked the Carmel Strong Dill gherkins which haven’t been there for nearly a week (since I tweeted about it a month ago on September 9). Obviously they weren’t there.

Why would we keep stock of something
that keeps selling out?

They were also out of stock of the other products I look for every time I visit. Products that a lot of people like and products which are only there once in a blue moon, before they get sold out again. Notables include Carmel Strong Dill Gherkins, Judy’s Pickled Onions (strong) and Goldcrest Jalapenos. What does that tell you, guys? Maybe people like these products? Maybe you should order more? Does that not make sense?

It is interesting to note that these are the very same products I chatted about a YEAR ago – an article I wrote highlighting the fact that the Friendly store was out of popular products (as well as can openers), but were sure to have stock of home TIK testing packs.

Sunday had an extra twist, however, as I gave the lady at the till R50 to pay for four cans of cooldrink (total price around R25). She asked if I had anything smaller. I said no and she told me I had to wait for someone to bring change from “the back.” She gave me the R5 coin part of the change and then said I had to wait for the final R20.

There was another man waiting in front of me for change from a previous transaction. A classic “fuckshow” was developing before my very eyes.

Surely this wasn’t happening? I gave her a R50 note, not a R200 note! How could they not have R20 change?? It was a Sunday. I had ventured out of The Safe House cocoon, driven 5km, JUST to buy a cooldrink – and now I was stuck at the fucking till.

On a SUNDAY! Are you kidding me?

I waited for what seemed like an eternity, as everyone just stared ahead of them, blankly. I didn’t want to cause a scene and said, “look, I’m a regular customer, you’ve seen me here before, how about you just make a note that you owe me R20?”

“I can’t do that,” she said.

“Why,” I asked.

“Because maybe I won’t be here when you are here again.”

“Oh, God,” I sighed, “then stick the note on the wall, I don’t care, but this is ridiculous, I would rather get the money another time than spend my Sunday in a queue.”

She looked at me with a face that says, you’re a clever dick, aren’t you?

“Can you make a little note please – I’m dying here. I just want to drink my Stoney at home,” I pleaded.

And that’s when it happened.. She gave a MASSIVE huff and a puff and banged on the till, releasing the change drawer.

She flicked up those metal things that hold down the money, pulled out two R10 notes and slammed them on the counter, PISSED OFF.

I was speechless. “You had that there the whole time?” I asked. I didn’t wait for an answer and walked out. Upon exiting, I sideswiped the neverending management meeting that takes place in the “dining” area of the shop, very near the entrance and the tills. Naturally the team at the table were blissfully unaware of the pain their customers were going through a mere 10 meters away from them.

I gave my story, but don’t know why I did – it’s never helped anything before, why would it now? And no, he didn’t apologise.

Stunning vibe. A year down the road – still no change (scuze the pun).

Keep it up, guys.

CLICK HERE to follow 2oceansvibe on Twitterand enjoy some behind-the-scenes Seth action.

I’m really so impressed with the support shown for this campaign. It’s such a brilliant concept, which let’s you the public donate your old jeans to those who need them – in return for Levi’s shopping vouchers.

Genius!

So there was a live 5FM broadcast at UCT last Friday, which added another 405 pairs of jeans to the Get Rid Of Your Jeans For Good cause! Bringing the total to 5,266 pairs of jeans!!

Not shy!

Aah, the students!

Get into those pants, baby!

The 5FM team, live on air!

Well done, UCT! You’ve made us proud! And to attend lectures for the rest of the day in your jocks is a very noble undertaking!

Let’s keep it up guys and gals – the competition is still running and remember, Levi’s will pay you up to R200 for your old pair of jeans. AND you’re helping charity!!

Wallet gets looked after, as well as your karma..

It’s too easy!

Go! Go! Go!