2oceans Vibe

Did you catch the 16-page RE: insert from the latest issue of ELLE magazine?

According to PopYaCollar:

Lenny Kravitz’ daughter, Zoë, headlines a star-studded cast in the latest Woolworths RE: brand campaign, which kicked off with a massive insert in the latest ELLE magazine. Zoe was also on the cover and shares space inside with the likes of top SA musicians, Xander Ferreira from Gazelle and Mark de Menezes from the Dirty Skirts. The Rock & Roll theme runs further, with a TV ad, punctuated with Joan Jetts’ most famous song, “I Love Rock and Roll.”

It’s very exciting for all of us at RE: and I hope you like the new range. How hot are those red skinnies?

I scanned the whole 16-page insert in for you and you can CLICK HERE for the PDF download page!

Very cool – good job, Woolworths!

Click here to download the 16-page PDF, featuring Zoe Kravitz.

Woah! I was more than over-the-moon when this little video appeared in my inbox. I have no idea if it is purely on the web or if it’s on TV as well, but one thing is for sure, it’s RED HOT!

Check out this ad for Woolworths Distraction Lingerie:

Well done, Woolies – now you’re talking my language!

They seriously should have called it OnlineBrowniePoints.co.za instead of WooliesHampers.co.za, because that is essentially what it is. It’s an online machine that produces brownie points in exchange for a few mouse clicks and a credit card number.

Seriously. It’s quite silly.

Remember that hamper I bought last week for Marina, to celebrate the birth of their baby boy, Luc? Ja, well, let me just tell you… The delivery arrived a few days ago and I have.not.heard.the.end.of.it! The sms’s and emails from Marina were one thing, but the word of mouth was another.

Brownie Points
Now available online

I cruised into Vida e this morning and, whilst in the queue, I could hear the voice of one of Marina’s crew, coming towards me. I didn’t know which one it was nor if it was aimed at me, so I just listened to see how close the voice came.

OH

MY

GOD

DOLL!!

With the huge lushes lips now right next to the back of my neck, I had no option but to turn. Yup, I was right on both counts. It was one of Marina’s crew and it was intended for me.

HOW (kiss on one side – BANG!)

ARE (kiss on the other side – BANG!)

YOU!!!?

“Very well thanks, my darling – and how are you?!” I asked. (“One mucho cappuccino to hamba please,” I quickly ordered my coffee from the barista)

She did not tell me how she was, but rather got straight to the point.

“OH.MY.GOD.HOW.STUNNING.IS.THAT.BABY.HAMPER.YOU.SENT.MARINAAAA?!” (shakes head rapidly from left to right, mouth agape)

Waaah!, I thought to myself – this is an absolute joke!

“Oh ja, did she get it?” I pretended to have forgotten.

“Did she get it??? DID SHE GET IT??? Babe, you can do NO harm in her eyes at the moment let me tell you. NO.HARM.AT.ALL!!

People were staring at this stage, as I shepherded the bearer of amazing news to the corner of Vida e.

“Well, that’s really great – I’m glad she is happy and that the baby is fine.”

“Which Woolworths did you buy it from,” she asked.

“Oh no, I bought it all online, at www.woolieshampers.co.za – it’s all on 2oceansvibe!” I said, hoping that she would read more regularly in future so I didn’t have to repeat myself in real life.

“TOO DIVINE, DOLL!!!!” (the boobs were falling out at this stage, as the arm of the sunglasses were placed in the mouth)

It went on. I won’t tell you the rest as you might get bored. But what I can tell you is that I feel like a hero. I feel like I saved someone’s life on live television. That’s what it feels like. For going on a website, choosing something and clicking “Checkout!” How crazy is that?

Instant brownie points, I tell you! I’m currently looking at getting the Christmas hamper for The Muse’s mother..

If only The Muse knew her mother’s address, we’d by A for Away!

There tons of other hampers so check them out by clicking HERE.

It’s basically Brownie Points Central and I’m the mayor.

There is a saying I made up a few years ago when I used to smuggle my cat, Homer, through customs. I used to tell my friends, “Don’t let the cat out the bag.” Since then, it’s use has slowly evolved and now people use it as an actual saying. They mainly use it to describe the revealing of a secret or a surprise.

An example of an actual cat being let out of a bag

So right now I’m going to let “the cat out the bag” about something I bought for someone. I’m not sure if they got it yet, but I can’t help telling you about it, because it’s a beautiful thing and you need to know about it.

Cape Town’s social circuit will know that the queen bee, Marina, from The LIttle Black Book, recently had a beautiful baby boy, Luc. Obviously with these kind of things, it’s quite tricky with regards to visiting times. Is she back from the hospital yet? Do they want visitors? Etc. etc.

That’s why I decided to take my mouse for a stroll down to the Woolies website yesterday. Now, being a premium quality SA brand, 2oceansvibe is no stranger to Woolworths, and we’ve recently indulged in their web vibe (let alone their steamy jeans ad – Gee whizz, Woolies! On the edge, hey?).

They seem to have updated their website since I last went – and have now included these “hampers.” They show up on the main page (bottom left) and, when clicked, it actually takes you to a seperate website – JUST for the hampers!

Just trust me when I tell you that www.woolieshampers.co.za will make you a rock star, for doing absolutely nothing. Please enjoy the first hamper I saw on the page (no spice – you can see for yourself here):

Are you joking?

The headline for that hamper was “A new baby boy“ and apparently includes:

cuddly teddy bear (nice)
soft, anti-pill polar fleece baby blanket (great)
machine washable bibs (thank heavens for that!)
earth friendly natural baby cream and baby powder (I’ll take that)
celebratory sparkling grape juice (whoo-hoo!)
1 memento iced duck biscuit nougat treat (fine)

“Oh, for God’s sake!” I said to myself, as I realised how ridiculously easy this all was.

Next to it was “A new baby girl.“ And then it just spiraled. “Snack Hamper” was the next one. Then “Mad hatter’s tea party,” “Nibble and braai,” “Coffee and chat,” “Festive treats” and so on, and so on, and so on. Check them all out here.

Did you enjoy the name of that one? Coffee and a chat! Haaaah! That’s hilarious! It’ll fly of the shelves in the Southern Suburbs, I tell you what; as the bored housewives kill time before picking up their daughters at Herschel.

*cough* That’s obviously after the pool boy has left.

I’ll let you know what Marina says, but it’s obviously going to be a hit and I’ll be ranked as “awesome.” For what? For a click here and a click there. Please…it’s too easy. It’s basically just all a big joke.

With the NIGHTMARE that is festive season shopping, I’ve got my eye on this very cheeky little Festive Treats Christmas Hamper…

Shame, that’s difficult to click..

I might just blast that through to a few people and earn a lifetime supply of brownie points while I’m at it.

Hmm.. now who has been behaving..

CLICK HERE to be awesome from the comfort of you own desk.

It’s common knowledge that I am a big fan of the Woolies JT1 lingerie range (I’m not alone, it seems) and have never seen a better example of why this is, as on Saturday night at the JT1 fashion show which took place at Cape Town’s FTV Cafe. Every single girl involved was an absolute angel.

But if I HAD to choose one, it would be this naughty little thing:

Very naughty

Jeepers Hudders – I’m fine with that.

She can be my Angel Wingman, anytime!

Check out a quick slideshow of her and the angels HERE.

Whilst the TBG’s (Tall Blonde Guy) spell is being felt and discussed as far afield as New York, I received this TBG sighting over the weekend.

In a very rarely seen twist of fate, a Capetonian managed to double up an incredible 33rd birthday with a TBG sighting!

I mean, REALLY, what are the chances!!??

Let’s see what Shaheen had to say!

Hi Seth

Last night I had my 33rd birthday party at Woodstock Lounge having a total blast.

Afterwards we decide to get something to eat at the Engen Woolies.
I did not think the night could get any better when my wife tells me, in that hushed tone one uses when discussing Da Vinci’s finest at the Lourve: “There’s the TBG!”

I cannot tell you how much better that made my birthday. I was in the presence of sheer awesomeness! And on my birthday!

Thank you TBG for making this the best of my 33 birthdays!

Shaheen

If the TBG wasn’t the symbol of all things good and amazing in the world, I’d swear this was staged! I mean, to think that some people wait a lifetime to feel the aura and be present in the TBG’s greatness, and here Shaheen gets it ON his very birthday!

UN REAL!

We should also congratulate Engen and Woolworths for facilitating such late night TBG sightings! If it wasn’t for the 24 hour Woolies in Gardens, this may never have happened!

Click here for past TBG sightings.

Nice to see Woolworths aren’t scared to sex it up a little bit when the moment takes it. This video must have given the Woolworth’s ultra-conservatives a heart attack!

Two things to be aware of – the track in the background is Fort Knox by Goldfish (my personal fave tune of theirs) and the main model featured in the vid is none other than 2oceansviber and previous 2oceansvibe Weather Girl, Gabriella Demetriades.

Check it out:

Wow – there is so much “SYNERGY” between Woolworths and 2oceansvibe. They’re using models and bands that are all a part of the vibe!

Well done, guys!

I cruised into Woolies on Saturday with The Photographer (who just won a bronze lion at Cannes for this, I might add) and spotted something I had never seen before.

“Suck me sideways!!” I yelled, “look at THIS!!”

Woolworths have now erected a “complementary sanitising wipes” station next to the trolleys. It dispenses wet-wipes for you to wipe the trolley handle with. Something Howard Hughes would be very pleased about.

We were at the Sea Point Woolworths and it came as no surprise that an elderly Jewish woman in her mid-90′s with blue hair and a Yorkie tottered up and actually used the towels to wipe the trolley handle.

Excellent!

“You can’t be too careful these days, Ruth!”

“Oh, I know, Agatha – what with swine flu and all!!”

Seth wipes his precious hands..
[please excuse my state - I had just landed that morning!]

It would have been better if they had spelt it “complimentary,” which refers to something being free, which is what I assume they meant? And I think it would be naughty to argue they meant it in terms of the wipes complementing the trolleys.

Let’s have a quick run through.

Click these guys to find out more.

Complimentary

vs

Complementary

Got it?

Here ends today’s lesson.

Now I’m sure you spotted those Woolworths Mother’s Day ads around 2oceansvibe. Mm, it gave you a fright, didn’t it? Mother’s Day always seems to creep up on me. It’s one of those tricky ones, because it’s not a set date. It’s one of those “second Sunday in the month” vibes. It IS in May, by the way. Just for the record, that’s this month. In fact, it’s THIS WEEK! I’m serious. Mother’s day is the second Sunday of May every year. Father’s Day is a different story, but we’ll chat about that nearer the time. Let’s focus on mom here for a second.

Ok, so that makes Mother’s Day on May the 10th – THIS Sunday! So time is not a luxury you have. So hold on tightly, ‘cos I’m taking you on a quick ride. Which starts like this. It’s a real tin of fudge and I got it free and my mother won’t know the difference!

Yes, FREE.

Free!

You’re probably wondering how I got that fudge for free if the price above clearly states R49,95? Quite simple – that is because they gave me a R50 voucher when I signed up to the Woolworths online shopping system. And you can too. I’m dead serious – CLICK HERE and see for yourself. It’s not the only thing that costs R50, by the way!

So, that aside. You can pretty much count on Woolworths to have a selection featuring EVERYTHING that your mother would love. It doesn’t get much easier, to be honest. I found myself click-click-clicking away and securing some classic winners. I’m going to score some MAJOR points with the latest in the Woolworths TASTE cookbook series, which I remember my mom RAGING about to her cronies.

Woolworths TASTE cookbook
Major points!

Well it’s either that or one of these ridiculously awesome fleece gowns. My mother used to have one which she got from some up market lingerie store, but I stole it from her. I’m an only child – I can get away with that kind of stuff. But I do feel bad so I might throw in one of these beauties! Are you aware of how cuddly these are? She’ll feel like she’s snuggling up to a three week old golden lab.

Do you KNOW how awesome these gowns are?

But I don’t want to get carried away on the big things – I might throw in a few small items. Some exfoliating soap, for example, NEVER hurt anyone’s mother!

R19.95?
Come on, this is too easy!

Or the foam bath and body lotion combo!
At R49.95, you could get this free
With your R50 voucher when you sign up!

Throw it in!
I can see my grandmother enjoying these..

Chocolates..
..a given!

When last did anything cost less than R10?

Warming Booties?
My goodness, they’re too adorable!

And so it goes on – it’s actually getting a bit much. And those are only SOME of the Mother’s day gifts they’ve got. As I write this, I’m scrolling through the other items available and there are loads more gifts for mothers, grandmothers and mothers-to-be. From beautiful floral bouquets and pretty jewelry to delicious treats and bath time indulgences. For the mom who loves flowers, they’ve even got special Mother’s Day bouquets and potted plants .

And it’s affordable too – I noticed a bottle of sparkling wine for R24.95! And they’ve even got proper French Champagne for R215. The last time I bought a bottle of French Champagne somewhere else it cost R625! There’s shower gel, perfume, candles, vases, handbags, picture frames, gloves, body butter, travel bags, gift bags, note books, bracelets and more. It’s ENDLESS!

And remember, if you don’t know what to buy, you’ll do particularly well to get your mother/grandmother a Woolworths gift card – to let her decide what she wants to buy from Woolies.

Do yourself (and your mother) a favour and go to the Woolworths Online Shop, register, claim your fifty bucks, choose some Mother’s Day gifts and THEY’LL deliver it for you. To your mother’s door! I can’t recall it ever being any easier than that!

Click the image below to take you straight there!

CLICK HERE to shop online at Woolworths

Well done – you’re finally making sense of all the chaos and getting one step closer to living the holiday!

Go go go!

CLICK HERE to shop online at Woolworths

I bought a couple of these puppies at Woolworths earlier this week and haven’t had a chance to try them yet. It’s a can of Thai Green Curry from Woolworths and comes with bamboo shoots and baby corn! On the label it says : “just add chicken, fish or prawns.”

I also bought 4 portions of free range skinless chicken breasts, using 2 pieces (which I cut into strips) for this, my first curry.

I chose the conventional instructions, rather than the microwave and popped the contents of the can into a pan. I brought it to boil and then let it simmer, adding the chicken pieces. No CRAZY cooking, just a light simmer. 3 on the stove setting (out of a possible 8).

What can I say – I’m a pro!

Not much stress so far and, with the chicken costing an effective R16 (half the four-pack I bought for R32), and the can of Woolworths thai green curry costing next-to-nothing (I forgot and the slip is thrown away – whoops!) – it’s pretty reasonable! Obviously this doesn’t matter when you have fabulous wealth, but it certainly is nice to know!

I went back to the living room and allowed the 18 year old Brazilian farm girl to continue my neck massage, which is often the case whilst writing this column for YOU.

Not ten minutes later the chicken was cooked and I was finally able to dish myself my very first curry.

GIVE ME A BREAK!
Curries are too easy!

I took a few mouthfuls and had to go to the bathroom to find a tissue. It was so damn good, I was moved to tears.

No, my friends….you have never..

Just…

Just get it.

Thank me later.

But I’d move if I were you. They’ll move pretty fast after this.

* Oh I forgot to mention the fact that it only has 4.7 grams carbohydrates, 14.2g total fat and 0g cholesterol. Perfect for fatty boom booms.

I mention a lot of cool eating and drinking establishments and shops on these pages. Everyone from Caprice and Miss K, to Vida e, Butlers and Woolworths. There is a reason for that; I’ve bought into their brands and I feel it is safe for you to do so as well. They are brands that I trust and I’m happy to work with them because of their attention to detail, level of service and quality. And, as long as that is maintained I will continue to do so. They look after me, sure, but that gives you instant recourse. Everybody knows that.

Every now and then I’ll veer off and try other brands and, if they adhere to these basics, I’ll keep using them. Hell, I’ll even give them a second chance.

Or a third (and final) chance, as was the case with Primi Piatti in Camps Bay, who proudly advertise that they will deliver anywhere in Camps Bay, at no charge.

I decided to treat The Muse to some lamb chops at The Safe House about a week ago and gave them a tinkle. I thought I had a crossed line with someone in Iraq, as the noise was so loud I could have sworn I heard gunfire. The guy was SCREECHING down the line.

“HELLOOOO!!!!!!!!” shrieked the orange oompah loompah.

“Hi, yes, hello there. I’d like to order some chops for delivery please”

“WHAT!!!???” came the desperate sound of a man dying.

“Are you ok?” I asked, worried for the man.

“WHAT????!!!!” he screamed.

I covered the mouth piece of my phone - “This might end in tears,”I informed The Muse as she winced, noticing my “Moer Meter” going up.

“I WANT TO ORDER SOME LAMB CHOPS FOR DELIVERY!!!!”

“Ok”

“Ok?”

“Yes, LAMB CHOPS?!?! You want LAMB CHOPS?”

“Yes!!!!”

“Ok!!!”

“Cool, is that it? Don’t you want my address??”

“Ok!”

“Ok?”

“Yes, give your address!” (he was in the tank now. Taking the call from a satellite phone INSIDE a tank, in a war)

(they were losing, by the way)

I gave the address. Several times.

“OK!”

“Ok?”

“Yes, we see you now!”

“Don’t you want a credit card number?”

“Ok!”

“Ok?”

“Ok!”

I gave the number. Every four numbers I read out he just said “yes.” It was quite clear that he was trying to remember the card number in his head and wasn’t writing anything down. Jesus, I don’t even do that, and I can recite pi to 75 decimal places.

Surely this wasn’t REALLY happening? Surely I was being Punk’d?

“Can you read that out to me?” I asked, as The Muse tried to remove the knife that I was holding to my throat.

“Can I call the manager?” he asked.

“THE MANAGER!?!?!? WHAT DO YOU MEAN? DID YOU WRITE THE NUMBER DOWN OR NOT?”

“Hold on…”

Oh my sweet fuck, I couldn’t believe what was happening.

The manager came on and took the number down, as well as directions.

An hour went by.

They called. They got lost. I gave the directions again.

They arrived half an hour later.

And at R120 PER PORTION of teensie weensie lamb chops, which were so rich I could have started a hedge fund, I just don’t think it was worth it.

I felt violated.

Seriously, guys, don’t say that you can do something when you can’t. There’s a word I use for that – it’s called “a lie.” Either you train your staff properly to handle it, or leave it completely.

And that, my friends, is the end of it. That was the last time I will order R120 a portion lamb chops for delivery from Primi Piatti Camps Bay . The previous two deliveries failed as a result of pretty much the same thing, only more watered down. The result was the same. Unsatisfied..

Such a pity.

When all you want is a good portion of chops to arrive at your door.

God! It’s so tiresome!

CLICK HERE to view HelloPeter’s almost daily list of Primi Piatti complaints.

It was a couple months back that the Interior Decorator told me that I “simply HAVE to visit DVD Nouveau” on Bree Street in Cape Town. She told me about their incredible selection of DVD’s for rent, including every series and all the classics. I looked for the shop, but I couldn’t find it and gave up.

Then I tried one more time and spotted it next door to Boss Models, in a little yellow building, 166 Bree Street, near the four-way stop.

What other DVD shops want to be when they grow up.
DVD Nouveau
166 Bree Street

As Cape Town DVD rental stores and DVD shops in Cape Town go, this is, without doubt, the best there is. The Interior decorator was 100% spot on when she mentioned the range found at DVD Nouveau. Two examples should be enough for you. 1 – they have all four seasons of Entourage and 2 – they even have the classic 11 minute short, Dinner for One. You might remember Dinner for One was that black and white production that used to run every New Year on SABC. The one with the butler who gets absolutely smashed whilst serving the lady of the house and her imaginary guests. The quote “the same procedure as every year, James,” and his tripping over the animal head on the carpet might be a couple of highlights that tweak your memory.

Honestly, there hasn’t been one movie that I have tried to rent that they didn’t have. This weekend’s random request for the Dreyfuss/Midler/Nolte classic Down and Out in Beverly Hills was too easy for them. This morning I rented the box set of Louis Theroux interviews. You don’t know who Louis Theroux is? Get it. Trust me.

HOW stunning!!??

An old converted home, the DVD rental shop sports four separate rooms, each showcasing a different theme/genre of DVD to rent; with everything from latest releases, to foreign films, documentaries, comedy etc. The little sofa’s and chandeliers are TO DIE FOR!

So there is not much more I can tell you about this gorgeous little find, other than you need to get your ass there ASAP. Oh, there is one more thing – all DVD’s (except new releases) have a TWO DAY return policy! That’s right, you only have to return them after two days. Pretty cool!

This article would not be complete without a mention of my favourite new popcorn which goes perfectly hand in hand with ANY DVD. Please enjoy the new Woolworths popcorn!!

It’s just too incredible to behold!

Woolworths popcorn in its own box!
To die for!

I know!

The new Woolworths popcorn comes in its own box! So, unlike the other brands out there (sis!) you can eat the popcorn from the container you made it in. And it’s so much fun to operate! Like a popup book, the Woolworths popcorn comes in a flattened box, and you simply pull the two little tags outwards and *POP* the box stands to attention – ready for some microwave action!

It’s no secret that I shop at Woolworths and I often document my various experiences of their shops and products. As you know, I stick mainly to the Woolworths Food Section, but have been known to delve ever-so-slightly deeper. Most recently was the article about the Woolworths Earth Friendly Range of household cleaning products (which Mavis approved of – thank God!), as well as my attendance at the inaugural Woolworths Wine Festival held in Wellington, which was a raging success.

As with most things on 2oceansvibe, word seems to have got around and the Woolworths powers-that-be sent me a little package which I have JUST opened this very second.

It came with this card and message..

 

Dear Seth,

We thought we would lend a hand with your Christmas shopping.

Please find attached a CD with images and descriptions of some of our Christmas products, as well as a gift card for your enjoyment.

Thanks for the support.

Happy holidays!

Woolworths

ps. We’re offering free gift wrapping this year, as usual..

OH MY GOD – how cheeky is that!? I can honestly say that I am close to tears right now! Whilst constant attention and adoration certainly are commonplace around these parts, I did not expect a brand as big as Woolies to have their finger on the pulse to this extent! I’m speechless..

Not for long. I’m fine now.

Now I don’t know how much cash they’ve loaded onto this Gift Card (note to self – get USB magnetic strip card reader), but I’ve been having a squizz through this CD at some of the stuff they’ve got on the shelves for Christmas, and I reckon I could get most of my shopping out of the way in one go!

I’m also pretty pissed off to tell the truth, because I should have waited a bit longer before I bought this little beast from Woolworths two weeks ago! Arrgh, the pain of spending money when you don’t have to!

My brand spanking new Cafe Retro
Espresso machine from Woolies

How gorgeous is that? It works like a dream, too! I’d love to tell you how much it was, but I actually can’t remember. I remember it being quite insignificant, for what I was getting. I think it was just over a grand. Seriously.

So, besides the pewter busts of myself that I send to various heads of state, I don’t really have a long list of close family that I buy prezzies for. I tell you one thing though, with the difficulty involved in getting The Muse out of bed in the morning, I’m pretty stoked that Woolworths sell these little beauties..

Portable iPod docking station with
alarm clock and radio! Are you kidding me?

Hey? Did you even know that they sold digital stuff at Woolworths? Neither did I! And they’ve got LOADS of stuff. Check out this digital weather station – my dad is a weather NUT, this will go down like a homesick mole!

Digital weather station!
Come on, man – it’s too easy!

I’m not going to get too carried away before I find out how much money is in this gift card they gave me. But I do think I should run you through some of my personal choices.

“Ageless” cleansers and travel kit
Mother dearest – nailed!

Scented body wash..
Grandmother – done!

Jewel Thong Slippers
God-Daughter – nailed!

Radio-controlled Lamborghini
Other God-Daughter – done!

I beg your pardon?

You what?

You don’t think it’s a suitable gift for a little girl?

And can you picture me playing with teddy bears or dolls ?!

No you can’t.

Can you drive a teddy bear on the road?

No you can’t.

She has to learn how to drive one day, doesn’t she?

Yes she does!

It’s a LAMBORGHINI, people! She also has to learn which guys to target, doesn’t she?

Exactly, it’s dual purpose.

Mind your own business.

Ahem, sorry about that..

My goodness, the list of Christmas products on this CD are endless! The file size is also massive, so what I’ve done is I’ve put together a portion of the products available and you can CLICK HERE to download it and check it out for yourself.

I must say, I’m bloody impressed.

Well done, Woolworths, and thanks for the gift card!

Mwah!

x

Yes, interestingly enough, I managed to get my hands on the Country Road 2008 Summer Catalogue . And, I tell you what, I was glad that I did. Please enjoy the absolutely ANGEL they are using for the entire ladies section!

Helloooo, my laydeh!

Hey!? Are you ok with that?

And please, there is no shame in ogling a catalogue girl. Just because you have access to a multitude of sin on the internet, it doesn’t mean you can’t appreciate this kind of stuff.

It takes me back to my high school days – where the closest thing we could get to seeing naked bodies was in the Photography section of the library, which had like one page of nude photography instruction – worn down to a grainy image after years of horny evil little boys thumbing through it.

There was also that AUDIO tape someone made of an actual skin flick, which did the rounds in the dorm. God, what was that about?

Back to the angel in question! I would like to add that there is a stunning shot of her in a one-piece there as well. Download it below and drift off into dreamy-dream land.

CLICK HERE for
Country Road Summer 2008 Catalogue
Download page (3.3Mb)

I’ve never been to the Diemersfontein Wine Farm before and, given that it was the first of it’s kind, I had never before indulged in the Woolworths Wine Festival. And what a treat it was!

Positioned next to the town of Wellington and owned by Woolworths co-founders, The Sonnenberg Family, the farm is one of the most picturesque settings I have ever come across on the Cape Wine Route. My God, it was glorious! We took it in as we meandered along the lake.

The Woolworths Wine Festival at The Diemersfontein Wine Farm
The radio controlled ducks came in handy

There was much on the go as we hastily took in our surroundings, grabbed a goody bag (equipped with some Woolies crisps, biltong, nuts and wine glass) and got to work, tasting the multitude of wines on offer. With this short time away from 2oceansvibe’s beloved De Grendel wine, The Steenberg Sauvignon Blanc got a double thumbs up, as we got comfortable at the champagne and oyster bar.

Stunning!

We tasted (downed) The Steenberg Sav in this very tent.

The word “lush” could be used.

The Muse and I were the first to scope out and position ourselves next to the swimming pool with a dozen oysters and a bottle of Krone sparkling. And, I tell you what, it does wonders!

You know. For all sorts of things..

That’s what I’m talking about

The sexual energy of the oysters was felt by everyone.

A cougar, spotted at the watering hole.

Yes, you’re absolutely right, that is a cougar right there. Along with the comprehensive wine sales area, eating courtyard and live music, it was just another one of the attractions that added to the success of the day. Seriously, tick all the boxes : 30 degrees, plenty shade, no wind, live music, gorgeous setting, swimming pool, wine, oysters and cougars on the prowl – what more do you want?

Indulgence was the order of the day. I wouldn’t say I got completely vrot, but I certainly haven’t felt so content in quite some time.

It’s like a refined and sophisticated Rocking The Daisies!

Congratualtions Woolworths, you nailed it. This is definitely one for the annual calendar.

See you next year!

We’ve chatted before about this lovely game the Atlantic Ocean plays from time to time, called “lake-lake.” That’s what it is doing today. It usually comes with an ever-so-thin haze in the sky, causing the ocean to look almost metallic in colour.

Camps Bay – today
very kak

Yup, that’s the one. So anyway, I thought it would be a good day to whip through to Woolies and tell you about a habit you need to get into. It’s healthy, it’s colourful, and it’s so Goddamn tasty. I call it the “Melon Trio!”

Oh, I’ve just noticed that Woolworths also call it “Melon Trio.” I can’t believe it! That was MY name for it!

Anyway, Please indulge in this visual and flavoursome treat.

The Melon Trio
Oh my God! How stunning?

That’s basically what you’ve been looking for in your life. Those two photographs. Together. You need to be inside them. They need to be inside you.

Make it happen.

Be a better person.

Following my recent article about Mavis and the Woolworths Earth Friendly Range of products, I have received a number of messages from loyal 2oceansvibe readers informing me of the first ever Woolworths Wine Festival on the 8th and 9th of November.

It sounded nice, but then nice quickly turned to awesome when I heard there would be a champagne and oyster bar at the festival! Now you’re talking my language! That’s when I decided to do some research for you and stumbled upon a R1,000 prize that is up for grabs.

I got in touch with the Woolies PR department, and this is what I got:

Woolworths Wine Festival
At the Diersfontein Wine Estate

Taking place at the beautiful Diemersfontein Wine Estate, near Wellington just 45 minutes from Cape Town, it promises to be a fabulous opportunity to taste Woolworths wide range of wine and enjoy a chat with the winemakers and the Woolworths wine team.

With a plethora of wines on show from easy-drinking everyday wines to Woolworths celebrated reserve wines, there’s bound to be something for every taste and every pocket. Some of the more intriguing include “Festive Bubblies”, “Perky Pinks” and “Sassy Sweets”. Many of the wines will be available at special festival prices.

Woolworths renowned wine master Allan Mullins (apparently this guy is a LEGEND), will host wine blending sessions, and some of the 27 stands will feature food & wine pairings.

In addition to a champagne & oyster bar (guaranteed to be one of the most popular spots at the festival), there will also be plenty of delicious Woolworths food available to enhance the wine tasting experience, as well as live entertainment with Cape Town’s hottest Afro-Fusion band, CODA, heading the list. They’ll be joined by other local artists.

The festival will run from 11:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. on both Saturday and Sunday and will be an ‘adults only’ affair, as no under-18s will be admitted.

While Woolworths promises that there will be plenty of parking available, a nice touch for those who would prefer to leave the driving to someone else is that a shuttle will run between Cape Town and Diemersfontein throughout the festival at a cost of R 150 return. The pick up points and times are as follows:

” Waterfront: The Clock Tower Entrance – 09:50/18:00
” Northern Suburbs: Canal Walk – 10:15/18:20
” Southern Suburbs: Kenilworth Centre 09:30/18:45

Oh my God – too stunning for words!

I popped into the Kloof Woolies to have a peep at the range of wines that will probably be included at the Woolworths wine festival.

A smidgen of the wines to be featured
at the Woolworths Wine Festival

I don’t want to even BEGIN to tell you what they’ve got in those fridges, but I should tell you about a little competition not many people know about. Listen CLOSELY, because this is a FACT..

The Woolworths PR department informed me that if you email your unique festival ticket numbers (after buying them from Computicket ) to the Woolworth’s marketing team’s co-ordinator at jackie@liquidlingo.co.za you will stand in line to win R1,000 worth of Woolworths wine. FACT!

Very naughty!

Now I can’t tell you exactly which wines, but I can tell you that their range is EXTENSIVO! And R1,000 of any wine is pretty damn remarkable, if you ask me! As I said, the competition hasn’t been widely publicised, so you’ve got a pretty good chance of winning. So get your Woolworths wine festival tickets and email your unique ticket number to jackie@liquidlingo.co.za and get more than you bargained for!

Tickets for the Woolworths Wine Festival on either Saturday the 8th or Sunday the 9th of November are limited and available from Computicket at a cost of R150 each – so book soon to avoid disappointment.