UPDATE: We are aware this may have been a hoax (read here). Who-ever wrote it, we still think it is a genius response.

It’s Monday – no one really feels like being too productive, especially not in the grips of this freezing cold front currently chilling the country to a halt. This letter will inspire you to warm up and be better…

This is not breaking news, it is a few weeks old but oh my goodness it is good! This is an absolute gem, and definitely deserves a second read if you have read it before. Sir Richard Branson is just genius. So let’s give you a little context: the EFF sent this letter to appeal to Sir Richard’s moral decently telling him he was buying “stolen land.”

Most people would respond with indignance – not him. His response is classic!

Dear Honorable (Commissar) Andile Mngxitama Thank you for your letter warning me about expropriation without compensation of my Mont Rochelle Hotel and Mountain Vineyards owned by Virgin Limited Edition (VLI) in Franschoek. That is if the EFF come to power.

I do want to firstly assure you that we are used to expropriation without compensation. It is commonplace in the hotel business and I can’t tell you how many sheets and towels and pictures cutlery and plants go missing from our establishments.

One hotel owner lost a whole chandelier when a guest dismantled and smuggled it out in his brief case; in batches.  Our only crime-free establishment is on my island Nakar, where the guests probably think they might be searched on departure. May I also hasten to add that we do not own that surreally beautiful forty hectares of land in Franschoek.  At least not in the same way that we own the business, cars, equipment, vines and buildings. But I give you my word that all these movables are ours and will be disposed of before the expropriation date, using explosives if needs be.

He goes on to point out that land is not all that easy to either own or steal, concept set out eloquently and with the sort of dry humour we love to indulge in.

Please do read the full letter at Micampusmag – it will add joy to your Monday no matter how miserable you feel.