Yeah, so where exactly does one even start with a story like this? I get that people love cars (hence the popularity of a show like Top Gear), but this is taking that adulation to the next level.

Meet this guy from Brazil, about whom little is known other than the obvious fact that he must be terrible with the ladies. Why else would you resort to having sex with the exhaust?

Let’s play the silly puns game. Here’s Gawker:

Sounds exhausting.

You can hear the muffled screams.

I just hope he wiped his dipstick.

I’m not sure this is what they meant by emissions testing.