We’ve made it, friends, and we’re about to be stinkin’ rich.
Today we received a quite wonderful email from Lynne Brown, South Africa’s Minister of Public Enterprises.
Now poor Lynne has seen her name dragged through the mud of late, that enquiry into how Eskom fell apart at the seams accusing her of being ‘captured’.
You can read about that HERE, but we think all is forgiven. Lynne has reached out to us, in person, and she wants our help.
Move over, long lost Nigerian prince who needs money to free up his family’s fortune, because Lynne and her son are in town.
Here’s how the very personal email she sent us arrived – subject line ‘From Lynne Brown‘:
Yoh – look at all that money.
HERE’S that link to the government profile site she mentioned, if you want to know how legit this all is.
So legit – after all, look at the PDF below that came with the email.
Introductions aren’t necessary, Lynne, because we’ve seen your name splashed all over the news, but we appreciate the attention to detail.
Anyway, give this a read while we work out how we’re going to spend our newfound wealth.
Corruption at Eskom – I am SHOOK.
The money…let’s talk about the money. 20% of $15,5 million – that’s $3,1 million, or R42,5 million!
Seth is going to take the lion’s share, but we’re negotiating a deal where we split the rest amongst the writing and marketing team.
I’ll be putting mine into bitcoin, going vegan, taking up CrossFit, buying the new iPhone X and sending my children to Bishops. I can’t speak for the rest of the 2ov crew, though.
Just stick it out and I’m sure your big break will come. Karma is a real thing. I reckon Lynne must have seen my non-stop posting about the 67 minutes of charity work I did on Mandela Day earlier this year and decided to bless us.
That’s why it’s important to always document any charity work you do on social media, because you never know who’s watching.
You want people to know just how much good you’re doing, and also you should post loads of woke status updates and woke videos because a source tells us Lynne loves that kind of thing.
So what lies ahead for us now? We will continue to do what we do over here on 2ov, but just know that we will all be very wealthy soon.
Don’t hate us for it. Hate Lynne Brown, if you must, but this is a chance we just can’t pass up.
If she does email you please ignore her requests and do not email that address or call that number. We don’t want to share our 20% with you.
Make your own luck.
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