The end is nigh..
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I wasn't thinking the other morning and didn't realise my radio was stuck on 5FM (from the night before). I've mentioned this before and would like to reiterate that I firmly believe that Mark Gillman's cross weed-eater/circular-saw rasping screech of a voice is sub-consciously the reason behind 90% of the country's road rage incidents. Two minutes into the show I realised I had a migraine filtering across my brain. I nearly caused an accident as I launched myself across my steering wheel to change the station over to Kfm and Nic Marais (94.5 FM) who carries Mark Gillman's entire intelligence and humour capabilities inside the thin piece of skin between his left thumb and index finger. I've been doing some research and I'm willing to bet that Gillman is on the way out. Cape Times, I'll let you take it from here.

In science we call this a "vacuum"

Having a squizz around the "internet", I came across this little gem of an article which was written in March, 2003 and makes reference to him signing a 24 month deal with 5FM. So that went on until March this year. I've been told it was renewed again, but only for 12 months. If my calculations are correct, then in five months time, we, like Nelson Mandela, will enjoy freedom like no other. Radio stations have realised that the 'stark raving' novelty has worn off and the listeners would rather have something to think/talk/muse about, rather than point at. I doubt 5FM want to continue down that road.

There was further punishment to be had. Gillman's latest TV show which was called something like "Gillman, make me famous" was quite sad. It's been a number of years since I've seen visual footage of Gillman and when I had a glimpse at the show I couldn't help but cringe. I was shocked. To see a 35 year old man acting like a demented mole and attempting (most unsuccessfully) to be hip in front of 17 year olds is not nice to watch. And I mean that. As much as I can't stand him, at that moment I really felt for him. He's clutching at straws. It's over.

And so, in closing, I've taken some words by Eminem which were orginally directed at the musician, Moby. I've changed them slightly.

Gillman you can get stomped by bushmen,
you 35 year old straw headed fag
Blow me, you don't know me
You too old, let go, its over.
Nobody listens to your show

Seth Rotherham
Editor
2oceansvibe.com
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