My god.

I literally can’t even handle this right now.

Excuse me for a moment whilst I go for a quick jog around the block.

Also, this makes me feel that “Great” Britain has bigger (no pun intended) issues than South Africa does.

I would like to introduce you to Stephen and Michelle Beer. Between them they weigh 55 stone (that’s 350 odd kg’s), have 13 children and receive £2 000 a month of taxpayer’s money. Also, they had a very lavish £3 000 wedding, and guess who paid for that? Yes, the general public.

Michelle has seven children from a previous relationship, two of whom are in care and two who were put up for adoption. The others, she says, are ‘old enough to look after themselves’.

What a charming woman.

Darling Stephen is now so obese that he has a carer come in twice a day to wash and dress him (this costs another £8 000 annually) and it obviously comes as no surprise that neither of them work.

I will leave you with this delightful piece of info: they are too large to consummate their marriage.

Thank you, Daily Mail, for making me feel super-skinny.