Is this just wishful thinking, or are we watching the unravelling of the Orange Menace’s ‘political campaign’ in front of our very eyes?
This week he sacked his campaign manager Corey Lewandowski (HERE), but to be frank as his numbers plummet so do his chances of winning over enough imbeciles to take hold of the White House.
Side note – please take the time to look at one of those imbeciles in question HERE, this is what his hateful rhetoric has resulted in.
The thing is that Donald ain’t a gracious loser, so when it becomes apparent that he isn’t going to be president he will do the only thing he thinks will save face – quit.
So how can Trumperino pull that trigger and exit before Hillary publicly thumps him? Gawker says he has four opportunities:
Before the convention
…if Trump gets out before the actual convention, he never actually runs the risk of party Republicans pulling the candidacy out from under him come Cleveland. So he gets to rail on about the fact that not only would he have done it better, he could have done it better, too—if he’d decided to accept the nomination, that is.
At the convention
Trump can’t make it all the way to the convention just to fizzle out with some lame announcement about wanting to focus on the business side of things. What’s more, if he gets all the way to the convention only to quietly bow out, he is going to be instantly upstaged by whoever the Republican party decides to put in his place. This is Donald Trump’s nightmare…
…Why bother being President, a job he neither wants nor is qualified for, when he can do the only part he actually enjoys (screaming things on television) for the rest of his life? And if he announces at the convention, he gets to allude to the fact that maybe this was really his plan the whole time. Everybody wins.
After the convention
Things get dicey once the convention is over. Trump’s accepted the nomination. He’s having a good old time. Except his poll numbers keep dropping. The game’s getting less fun. And then to make matters worse, people keep trying to talk to him about policies, transition plans, and why his campaign is bleeding money. You know, things that have absolutely nothing to do with Trump, as far as Trump is concerned. Still, it’s really starting to kill his buzz. And what if he actually lost?
…Pinning his decision on his family would be the most viable option here. People generally get that. It allows him to say, “Crooked Hillary’s dirty campaign keeps attacking my children.” Or, “Melania can’t handle this.” Or “my 10-year-old son, Barron, who I may or may not keep locked up in a basement because no one ever sees him, can’t handle this.” Just as long he ends with, “Donald Trump will always put family first.” It’s a sympathetic line and something people might actually relate to.
After he wins the election
This is both the least likely scenario, (because Donald Trump will not win the election) and the ultimate power move. He doesn’t even really need to have an excuse for bowing out at this point—he already won!
Donald Trump could even go so far as to say he just plain doesn’t want it at this point. Because no matter what happens, he will always be able to brag about the fact that not only could he have done it better, but the American people knew it, too. And now, he’ll never actually have a chance to fuck up and prove his naysayers right.
After all, what does he care if he doesn’t actually fulfill all of his terrible promises? Because remember—Donald Trump doesn’t actually want to be the President. Donald Trump just wants to know that everyone loves Donald Trump.
I’d take any of the first three, but that fourth one makes me scared just thinking about it.
I’d also like to take this moment to remind Seth about our two cases of wine bet on Trump becoming president – my refusal to write off all American common sense looks set to pay off handsomely.
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