Thursday, February 13, 2025

Why Kim Jong Un Took His Own Toilet To Singapore (Make Sure You’re Sitting Down For This One)

The North Korean dictator arrived in Singapore for the Trump meeting with maximum security on hand, and his own porta potty. No, for real.

We all know how pedantic Kim Jong Un can get about security, spies, and safety, but this safety precaution of his is really just taking the piss.

And I mean that in both a literal and metaphorical sense.

According to a report by Sky News, the North Korean dictator has taken his own toilet to the Singapore summit where he held talks with Donald Trump.

I’m pretty sure Singapore’s toilets are nothing to sneeze at, so why the hell would the self-styled demi-god bring his own throne – er, I mean, bog to the summit? Why not a security blanket or something?

Apparently, his reasons are … well, they’re something else:

The portable device would “deny determined sewer divers insights into the supreme leader’s stools”, the South Korean newspaper Chosun Ilbo reported.

What a party pooper.

But seriously, Kim, I don’t think anyone in their right mind – paid or not – would want to rake through your stools. We’ve been done with your shit ever since you took over North Korea from your daddy.

Apparently, the porta potty isn’t the only thing the little man’s brought along:

A transport plane – one of three aircraft that headed to Singapore – also carried food and Kim’s bullet-proof limousine.

*Face-palms* If I had any hope for North Korea before, it’s now been flushed down the toilet.

Right along with Kim’s stools.

[source:skynews]