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Recent studies have found that 39% of men who live alone experience loneliness. Even more alarming is that one in three men believe that they don’t have a friend who could help them out if they were in need. Across the globe, men are finding it harder to build lasting friendships, even in the bustling cities of South Africa. This can lead to feelings of isolation and mental health problems. Below, we discuss how to make friends as a South African male.

Come Offline

There is a misconception that it is just the younger generation that spends all its time online gaming. Yet this isn’t necessarily true, as those in their late twenties to forties spend much more time gaming than their younger counterparts. A study by ExpressVPN shows that this increases with age, with 18% of those in the 46 and over age groups playing games more than 24 hours a week. While it can be easy to find new friends gaming, the connection is only via the platform and when it comes to deeper matters, friendships are left wanting.

Another online distraction comes from social media. It is easy to get into a hole where hours pass by as you scroll social accounts, or aimlessly start flicking through web pages online. All of these are very isolated activities, cutting you off from the world outside. To build friendships, make sure you are limiting your time online and setting aside time where you will have genuine, face-to-face interactions.

Find People You Have Things in Common With

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Once you have set aside time offline, you can begin finding people you share things in common with. This is easier than you think if you know your hobbies and interests. There will be plenty of groups in your local province, town or city dedicated to these. Contact them and see how they operate and when you can visit. Once you’ve done that, you can start to become social with people who have shared hobbies. You can even use apps like Friender to find people with similar interests directly.

Just because you have a shared interest does not mean you are guaranteed to be good friends with someone. However, you can use this as a starting point to see who you begin to make connections with. You can then start to take this outside of the confines of the club, inviting friends to do other activities.

Reconnect with Old Friends

If the concept of new friends is too much to handle, then consider reconnecting with old ones. People’s friendships drift apart for several reasons. Very often life takes precedence and people drift apart for no reason. Luckily, social media is a great way to find people with which you previously had strong bonds and reestablish them.

Start with friends who just fell by the wayside. If you are anxious about certain issues, then think about how you will tackle them beforehand. This is most likely to be the case if you fell out with the person over an issue before. Very Well Mind has advice on how to handle these situations.

There is no reason you can’t combine these ideas – cutting down on time spent online and using it to visit clubs and meet old friends. Not all of them will blossom into deep friendships, but one or two hopefully will and soon you will find loneliness begins to fade.