It’s common knowledge that I keep a number of pre-teen Cambodian kids under the floorboards at the Bantry Bay house; for the express purpose of manufacturing fake Havaianas flip-flops. I don’t feel bad about their living conditions, nor the fact that I feed them rubbish. Those kids wouldn’t have a floor over their heads if […]

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So we found ourselves at the Arniston Spa Hotel this weekend. We weren’t actually staying at the hotel, but rather a mate’s place. Nonetheless, we thought we would enjoy the very sexual vibe at the Arniston Hotel pool. For the uninformed and those of you who don’t know about the hotel or have never heard […]

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Not to be confused with Jack Black, the comedian. This is Jack Black, the beer – named after Jack Black, the 1920’s American outlaw, who came WAY before any other Jack Black that you may know. And I’m pleased to report that Jack Black Premium Classic Beer is out and about in Cape Town. I […]

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You may have noticed that new block to the right of the Vida e block on Somerset Road, Green Point. You may not have noticed our new favourite eatery called “Miss K – Food Cafe” that sprung up out of nowhere. I popped in the other day. miss k People who go there get laid […]

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I’m not going to say I’m altogether surprised, but it turns out we have actual proof of some of The TBG‘s powers – namely, that he can cure migraines. I’d say that’s pretty much a given – I mean, for someone who is rumoured to have given sight back to the blind and once even […]

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[To avoid potential emboerrissment, the incorrect spelling of “journalists” above, is noted!] whilst potentially emIt’s a concept largely ignored by most of South Africa’s daily and monthly publications – you know, hiring journalists who know what they’re talking about, have communication skills and even know how to spell. I’m certainly not saying that 2oceansvibe is […]

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The ever-territorial Glen Beach Locals (GBL) surfing fraternity have laid down yet another stern reminder to outsiders, that surf intrusions of any kind on “this break” will be more than just frowned upon. And a little suggestion to beginners wasting time with their shit – NO KOOKS!   And don’t forget it   It will […]

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I can’t cope! Just listen to this CAREFULLY! It’s like God and The TBG are up to something. Just a couple weeks ago on TBG Day (December 27), one of the 2oceansvibe characters, The UK Showbiz Guy (London’s #1 hit music station, Capital FM’s Johnny Vaughan) was with us in the 2oceansvibe online radio studio […]

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Well it had to come to South Africa, didn’t it? I mean, it makes sense – cheap pet health insurance for your dog or cat! In South Africa. Why didn’t YOU think of that? How about a warm round of applause for South Africa’s premier veterinary pet health insurance company – Medipet. See what they […]

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It’s competition time, friends! South Africa’s first and foremost online clothes shopping website, Adam & Eve (www.adamandeve.co.za) is THROWING it around at the moment! South Africa’s #1 online clothes shopping portal Outstanding! In an EXCLUSIVE competition with 2oceansvibe, ONE lucky reader will win one of these STUNNING summer dresses from every Cape Town girl’s best […]

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I thought I had found the perfect “tame” Cape Town handyman. He was not very different to the naked guy on the beach in Along Came Polly. He was very foreign, had a pony tail and was nothing short of “steamy.” He did everything from painting my house to tiling my deck – everything was […]

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I don’t often laugh out loud. Most things simply aren’t that funny these days. Everything just seems to be a variation of something else. MOST comic acts are so bad of late that I actually feel violated after watching them. I generally go home, weakened; I dive into the shower and scrub my body, in […]

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After a wonderful night at Caprice, following their ever successful Caprice Volleyball Day, we were treated to another pearler from our Lord Jesus Christ in the form of today’s perfect day (late 20’s, no cloud, no wind. Very sexual). I packed the perfect beach bag and took Libby (my scooter) down to The Strip to […]

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I surveyed Camps Bay from The Safe House, caned a joint, hopped on Libby (my scooter) and took a cruise to The Strip to scope out the skirt. You’d be a fool not to on a day like today. I liked what I saw. I parked the beast and made a couple calls on the […]

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I’m not going to get heavily into it, guys. You know, I’ve tried them all. Some are good, some are crap. Some will do. Some won’t at all . Some are cheap, some are pricey – some are dry, some are greasy. It’s a mine field out there. Finding the right product for your hair […]

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John Smit’s phone doesn’t have MMS so he was unable to send us a pic at this exact point in time, as the Springbok bus is currently making its way around Cape Town. I asked if he thought it was going well and he replied, "so far I would say it’s going well." Clearly tongue-in-cheek, […]

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A bird in the hand was clearly better than killing two in the bush with one stone for this young lady! My inbox has been involved in a bit of self-mutilation of late and, as a result, this TBG (Tall Blonde Guy) sighting was nearly gone forever! It is quite staggering that a sighting of […]

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Umm, I’m listening to a record at the moment. No, I mean it – a record. A vinyl record. Not the kind that DJ’s use when they "mix" and "scratch". No, no. I’m talking about the one used on the classic home vinyl record player. It feels nice. I bought it last week after accepting […]

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It’s all there – you just have to get to it. Like with your car or something like that. I don’t know – make a fucking plan. Took these pics for you around 13h00 today, Thursday 11 October, 2007 – the Thursday everyone has been talking about since Monday….          Where are you?

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No, is the answer. There is NO limit to The TBG‘s (Tall Blonde Guy) magic. I am once again without words….. In this most recent mind-boggling TBG sighting, we come a millimeter closer to understanding this romantic symbol of all that is good and stunning in the world. One day he is with God, discussing […]

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2007 TBG SIGHTING TURNS INTO PANIC As the great man appears injured I did nothing but scream at the top of my voice when I first saw this picture. “Noooo! Please, dear God, Nooo!!” as I saw images of The TBG (Tall Blonde Guy) with blood all over his body. But then I stopped and […]

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"Where were you yesterday? I waited an hour for you. I thought we agreed to meet for lunch?" "Oh, God, yes I totally forgot. Sorry. My bad." I fucking beg your pardon? YOUR bad? What in God’s name are you talking about? What the fuck is a bad? Is this some sort of experimental social […]

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One of the rules that I constantly try and enforce on myself is not to stock up on junk food. If I have the need for chocolate or biltong or sweets of any sort, I am forced to go to the shops and get it. I can’t keep a stock of sweets and only tickle […]

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Can anyone be so incredibly amazing? Sensing that Cape Town was on a TBG high, The TBG (Tall Blonde Guy) decided to bless other parts of the globe and was reported to be healing the sick and the weak and spreading general beauty and good-vibes in the East! How does this great idol find the […]

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Is it just me, or does this stuff happen to all of you? It’s like The Truman Show or something. I feel like I’m being hit with these mind-blowing human-interaction incidents WAY too often. Just a couple of weeks ago I received a vision in the form of an angel wearing my orange Polo jersey […]

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Oh yes! Crack open the shampiz, blow the dust off your shades, rub in the piz and promise not to behave – summer is here my baby and there’s nothing you can do about it! It’s quite evident that summer has begun Camps Bay was pretty empty when I found myself tip-toeing onto the beach, […]

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I won’t spend too much time on this ‘cos I’ll get really worked up and I want to save that energy for my story on the Camps Bay Friendly Store and the fact that the manager is without a doubt ACTIVELY trying to murder me (I have proof). Winex 2007 – Cape Town’s worst event […]

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I received an mms on my phone (Well, it’s the HTC TYTN, so it’s more a lifestyle than a phone) from The Marketer on Sunday morning. It was a picture he must have just taken on his phone (also a lifestyle). It looked something like this (click to enlarge) : "Octopus" – read the message […]

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We’re doing stealth-cool this season, boys and girls, and those in the know have already agreed on this season’s most sought after item. The Carlucci’s shopping bag. With the overflow of Louis and Chanel on the Atlantic Seaboard it will be the hard-to-find locally exclusive, absurdly cool, distinctive symbol of of things understatedly hot – […]

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I received an mms on my phone (Well, it’s the HTC TYTN, so it’s more a lifestyle than a phone) from The Marketer on Sunday morning. It was a picture he must have just taken on his phone (also a lifestyle). It looked something like this (click to enlarge) :   “Octopus” – read the […]

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