Those last two Billy Joel golden circle tickets were sold early this morning. Sorry to those of you who missed it or didn't bid high enough. Don't be sad. It's not COMPLETELY over for you!
Never fear! We have just received ANOTHER THREEGOLDEN CIRCLE TICKETS for tomorrow night's concert in Cape Town at the Bellville Velodrome. Our source for these three new tickets is happy with R1,000 a ticket.
So there you go! There will be no auction for these tickets. The first people to come forward will get the ticket. Email to editor@2oceansvibe.com with the subject "Billy Joel".
31 October, 2006 - The Showroom restaurant Cape Town
THE SHOWROOM GETS FULL MARKS
Cape Town's hottest ticket fails to disappoint [permalink]
Ladies and gentlemen, I am happy to announce that genuine international five-star dining is now available right here, in Cape Town. "theshowroom" (actual spelling) restaurant in Green Point seems to understand that a full dining experience takes more than just a good view. These guys have even cottoned onto the concept of "service". How novel.
I am always annoyed when I get asked if I have experienced something, when I haven't. I've been getting it quite regularly for two completely different things. I was asked over 300 times if I've watched the movie "The Devil Wears Prada" and the annoyance of having to continuously reply in the negative necessitated a solo Sunday morning viewing at the Waterfront. I loved it. It's fucking brilliant. Watch it. Seriously. I fucking loved it. The second constant question I was being asked was whether or not I had dined at theshowroom. I kept saying no, until I realised that it wasn't going away.
Show room this.
Show room that.
"ANGEL! Let's get a table at theshowroom, for God's sake!"
I didn't have any background to the restaurant (or probably didn't listen when I was told) and only realised it's unique location when I got there. The restaurant is on one side of the Bloomsbury "investment cars" (whatever) luxury vehicle showroom. At the bottom of Harbour Edge in town next to Cape Town's infamous unfinished flyover.
I like the heart rate monitor in the background .
Oh! I get it!
Showroom.
Like a show room.
Ok.
Good.
I must say, what is in essence the height of ostentatiousness, it (the venue and concept of having full view of R3million motor vehicles whilst indulging in top-end cuisine) is both brilliant and hilarious. It reminds me of my eight foot mounted poster of Paris Hilton I have in the Bantry Bay house. Such open flagrant celebration of the queen of superficial allows me to get away with being shallow. It actually indicates how deep I am. I am deep enough to know that I am shallow. Similar vibe...
Seth is deep enough to know that he is shallow
Back to theshowroom..... The small, split-level, white-on-white, mod 60-seater has got the mix just right. Obviously intending to create a local variation of the UK's celebrity chef culture (God help us), owner and chef, Bruce Robertson, (who decided that his full signature should form part of the logo as well as embossed on the menus) operates from a minute open kitchen in the downstairs section of the restaurant. I didn't spot any tantrums and the vibe between the staff in the kitchen is quite marvelous to watch. No one more so than Robertson's sidekick, the impressive Leigh Trout (I know) who bobs and weaves around his mentor like a shadow boxer in the ring - pure entertainment, keep an eye on him.
The show from the kitchen forms a minor part of the overall experience which Robertson has managed to tie together perfectly. Flawless presentation aside, the food will awaken your taste buds from their slumber and challenge them to a life of being better taste buds. I had the oysters to start which Blues Restaurant might want to have a look at. The menu is created around a large range of sauces, each of which add a unique taste explosion to your main dish. I ordered the springbok shank and went for the Chakalaka sauce. Sensational! My fellow diners all insisted that their particular choices HAD to be the best thing they had ever tasted. I am troubled by the daunting task of now having to try every dish on the menu, using every sauce combination. Seriously, it might have to be done.
From the smiles on the faces and the product knowledge and advice, it is quite obvious that the staff (thank you, Romy) have undergone real training. I use the word 'real' because Wafu restaurant (above and part of Wakame in Mouille Point) use the word 'training' and 'trained' incredibly loosely. Wessel at The Winchester Mansions in Sea Point has also apparently been 'trained'. Whatever, guys. Pop into theshowroom for some lessons.
Keep it up, Bruce and co., you've got it right.
This week sees them serving tables amongst the actual cars at Bloomsbury. I'm booked for Thursday lunch. Can't wait.
theshowroom
10 Hospital Street
Harbour Edge
Green Point
(If you don't have satellite navigation in your car (quite blind) then just turn right at your first traffic lights as you enter Somerset Road from Buitengracht.)
Call them on +27 (0)21 421 4682
Anymore than that I can't help you.
I mean.....really. I can't hold your fucking hand here.
Our THIRD Tuesday Tabs! Already! God, it's incredible!
And it seems like JUST yesterday....
Today we welcome another of the original supermodels - Elle Macpherson. Welcome, Elle.
It's a good look
Some of the guys in the boarding house chose Elle over Claudia and Cindy.
Not as many as Claudia and Cindy. But she certainly did have her support base.
Dubbed "The Body", there were no surprises here. We always knew that she was packing.
Click to enlarge and remove Francois (NSFW).
Thanks again, Francois. For everything. Seriously.
Ok, so there you have it. I was quite happy with the results of that one.
I have defintiely come into contact with duplicates of these before. It's quite hard to focus on enjoying them at the time because you just want to go out and celebrate.
I am getting quite bored of people who are ABSOLUTELY HORRIFIED at the offer of two golden circle tickets for R3,000 (for both tickets, together) for the Billy Joel concert on Wednesday night. Did anyone out there care to find out how much the original tickets cost? Let me help you out there - the original pair of tickets cost over R1,000 together.
Is it really such a mind-fuck for someone to pay just under three times the original price for concert tickets, 48 hours before the concert?
Please, man. Get over it. Get over yourselves.
The reference to R5,000 in the offer below was for people who don't feel like getting into a bid of any sort and wish to abuse their disposable income so as to secure the tickets without haggling. Did it ever occur to you that some people earn more than you?
As most of you will know, and those who live elsewhere may have heard, Cape Town is absolutely fucking beautiful today! These are the days that Cape Town is made for - and what better way to kick off a weekend of extravagance and indulgence, with a quiet glass of champagne at the Mount Nelson's Planet Bar..... ahh it's going to be so good. I am visualising it now as I touch myself. Sophisticated little angels everywhere, with little flutes in their hands, being all proper. But then later you find out that whilst she may be a lady on the street, she is actually a freak in the bed!
We have received MIND ALTERING footage of the great man [permalink]
I am trembling as I write this. A buddy of mine at a local ad agency managed to get hold of this mind blowing footage of the TBG (Tall Blonde Guy). Apparently the City of Cape Town are doing another big 'Keep the Cape in Shape' campaign and they have done a deal with none other than 2oceansvibe's favourite son, THE TBG!!!! They will be using him in a series of commercials doing incredibly amazing God-like things to do with litter-removal. My contact tells me the TBG is not charging a CENT for his services - such is his incredible giving nature.
God, he is truly incredible.
My contact reports, "The vibe during the taping the commercial was unbelievable. His well-known aura seemed to engulf all of us - like we were about to witness a miracle - and we certainly did. He was so cool and spoke to everyone on the set. We could all feel that we were involved in something truly special. Every time the TBG did something amazing (pretty much all the time), we would all just look at each other nodding and smiling - knowing that this was a defining moment in all of our lives. At one stage a crowd of about 300 people gathered to watch Cape Town's gift. He stopped the taping and went over to the crowd and spoke to most of them, shaking hands and signing autographs. I have never seen anything like this man in my life. I will never forget that day. Thank you TBG."
Unreal! The gift of the great man just keeps on giving. Is there no bounds to his grace and glory?
Just enjoy this footage - this has never been seen before. Watch it and remember it.
Apparently they filmed about 50 takes and the TBG got it in EVERY TIME!
Obviously!
I can't speak. I can't walk. I can't type anymore.
My very good friend and muse, James Stewart, is allowing us to indulge in his fine art of music creation on Friday night at Ignite in Camps Bay. James has been making hits since you were a child and he certainly isn't stopping any time soon. Friday night comes in the form of a live recording (with other greats who have worked with the likes of Eric Clapton, Phil Collins, Sting and more) so, if you clap or whoop at the right time, you just might make it onto the album. Either way, just make sure you're there - these kind of events don't come along very often.
Jammo Stewart - Hello my boy!
The show starts at about 7pm - I'm gonna be there with bells on. And balls, I suppose. It will form part of my roadshow which has necessitated the use of a chauffeur. The roadshow starts at the opening of the new Sienna and Mandy G shops at Wembley Square (shoes and jewelry - stunning!), followed by an appearance at Planet Bar and then on to Ignite. Aren't we a busy little boy!
I popped into Boardmans last week to get a desk of sorts and I didn't manage to find what I was looking for. I got to my car and looked under my arm and noticed that I had purchased something else. This happens to me from time to time. I automatically buy things that I simply MUST own and I don't realise I am doing it. I opened the package under my arm and was absolutely blown away!
I had bought an electric egg boiler. Good Lord! This is easily one of the most incredible purchases I have made in a long time. At under R200, you would be a fool not to buy one TODAY! Seriously, if these things sell out you will kick yourself.
Like a bullet
With eggs inside the bullet
They say a picture says a thousand words. Well, I think we all agree, this picture says a thousand words AND is a major turn on. Are you feeling hot? You should be. So enjoy this...... under that silver dome are seven slots to place up to seven eggs at a time. There is a measuring cup which tells you how much water to pour into the beast (determined by the number of eggs and hardness you want) and then you turn it on. The water turns into steam which cooks the eggs and then a buzzer goes to tell you everything is done! And I tell you what..... the eggs come out perfectly. No mess! No fuss!
So that's it, just a heads up on how to make your life better.
I did two batches of seven eggs immediately after purchase and left them in the fridge - AWESOME!
Another angel bites the dust and goes to 'find herself' [permalink]
I found myself at a bar the other night chatting to a very naughty little 20 year old angel. I was trying to get into her pants and was relying heavily on the results of the champagne I was plying her with. It didn't seem to be working. She was one of those "takka-takka-takka" can't stop talking types. Not ideal. She had just finished her studies and was london-bound in a couple months time. I took the 'old pro' angle and regaled stories of my triumphant times in the 'Big Smoke'. She was impressed, but not enough it seemed.
Off you go
On she went.
"Takka takka takka takka"
"oh really!"
"And then my sister..... takka takka takka takka"
The little angel started to moan about the fact that she was struggling to get all the usuals together - the work visa, the bank account, the job etc. before she leaves. I had heard a lot of this talk lately and it seems it is even harder to get organised than it was when I went over and raped the IT industry over there during the late 90's (left before the bubble burst..... 18 to 1 - ahh.. good times).
Personally I don't see what the problem is. I saw the opportunity and told the little angel that I would "sort everything out" for her.
WOW! What a change in her behaviour! The little minx changed her tune completely and was doing a whole "oh Seth" this and "Seth" that and stroking my powerful chest and gaaning aan like a proper little tart.
Some of you might have noticed the new ads on the site for a company called 1st Contact. They approached me to put the ads up because I became very good mates with the guys when I was in London. I gave them a call a couple of days later after the bar scene. Some of the same guys are working there and I put them in touch with the little angel.
It seems 1st Contact still know what they're doing because the results were ASTOUNDING! She honestly thought I had pulled some serious strings to get her sorted out. They literally organised EVERYTHING for her. The bank account, the job, the cellphone contract, the visa, tax refunds etc. I found it quite hysterical that she didn't know about these guys who are easily the biggest and best company in their field. Anyway, I got a house call and everything worked out according to plan!
El Benno
I thought this cute little story would be a good opportunity to tell you about my old mates at 1st Contact. If any of you lot out there are thinking of going over to the UK to work, or if you are already over there and want to extend your visa, you have to talk to these guys. Honestly, I used them for three years when I was over there. I have always preferred to pay a small fee for someone else to do the dirty work for me, and let me tell you, these guys do it well! The last thing you want to do is deal with the gratuitous red tape that gets heaped on you when it comes to things like visas and bank accounts. It's an absolute dog show!
So anyway, here is just a quick heads up to tell you about these guys - you'll be crazy to do it any other way. For the locals, they even have a SA office so give them a shout on 0800 003 163 or email them on saoffice@1stcontact.com
And to the boys over there, I hope you run into that little angel because she needs a hiding. Blonde, tiny, cute and answers to "Lucy" (or "baby shoes").
The response to last week's (our first) Tuesday Tabs was quite astounding. I was just mucking about - you know - like when you muck about with your muckers, (M Brain)......and now it's like a feature on the website.
Tuesday Tabs - a legend is born.
So you can all touch yourselves very gently as you realise you are a part of something that you'll one day tell your red headed step-children about.
Today's Tuesday Tabs feature is none other than Seth Rotherham's supermodel, Claudia Schiffer. We all had our supermodel as kids - and I mean the original supermodels - including Claudia, Cindy, Christy, Naomi, Elle, Helena and Linda. Most of the guys in the boarding house went for Cindy, but Claudia (now 36) was the only one who really completed me. I tried out a massive Cindy Crawford poster in my cube, but I wasn't being true to myself. She could never be Claudia, and she never was. My bedroom at home had pretty much a full wall of Claudia posters, pics and magazine tear-outs. My parents graciously fed my hunger and duly brought home Claudia Schiffer exercise videos from their trips overseas.
I do feel slightly bad showing you pics of Clauds without her top on as (now that I am an international man of leisure and pleasure) I will probably end up getting smashed with her in a jacuzzi somewhere and she'll have to do the walk of shame from my cabin the morning-after. My how the tables have turned, hey Clauds?
She will probably recognise me: "Are you that naughty little boy that used to be naughty in front of my pictures all day?"
"That's right, Schiffers, and I think we all agree...... KYK HOW LYK HY NOU!"
"You speak Dutch?"
"Maybe. You spank my bum?"
"Ooooooooh, you so NAUGHTY!! LIP MY STOCKING!!!"
But seriously, I have to be careful, it is very easy to end up next to anyone you talk about these days. My ex-girlfriend/muse actually worked for Claudia for a while in London and used to report back with tales. I never let on that Claudia was my original supermodel. She would have had too much enjoyment telling me stories. I pretended I didn't care, but put all the info into my wank bank, for later use.
Ok, in terms of her tabs I am very pleased. They have both excellent curvature and weighting. I would say that a together-squeeze would produced a wonderful picture before one's eyes. The nipples are of good size and nature and, when encouraged, could probably transform into a vision of sorts.
Ok, so here we have it. Thanks again to Francois Pienaar for hiding the tabs in this pic, as well as curing AIDS and adopting all existing African babies. You are a shining light and I feel it quite unnecessary for you to spend 27 years on Robben Island for our sins.
Click for bigger version. (NSFW, unless your bosses are semi-cool)
The boys host another glitzy fund-raiser [permalink]
On Wednesday The Rockstar boys host their third charity dinner under their 'Sin4Good' initiative. The first raised R12,000 and the second R28,000. Funds raised went to charities U-turn, Little Angels and the Breast Cancer Research Foundation. One of the gifts afforded by the last dinner was a kiln bought for U-turn which now enables the members to generate an income for themselves.
Continuing the initiative, The Rock Star Fund are hosting Wednesday's dinner at Cape Town's Fashion Cafe. The dinner is almost sold out and, if you move your arse, you could get a ticket which includes a lavish meal and a few friends of mine, including Chivas and Mumm.
Yes, this dinner will also include the extravagent raffle which includes prizes worth in excess of R20,000.
And, just for spice, the after dinner party is Goldfish doing their only gig for October as they take a break before recording their next album starts. They also probably need a rest from all the blow jobs they get backstage after their gigs whilst they toke on Amsterdam's finest and pour Mumm champagne over their bodies.
Mr. Ryan S from Fresnaye, Cape Town - part of the mighty Atlantic Seaboard!
Congratulations, Ryan! You were the fifth correct answer to our competition below. The correct answer was, of course, David Kramer. Mr. Kramer is a regular feature in Camps Bay. We like him there and he likes being there.
Ryan, one of the angels will be in touch for delivery of your three bottles of SKYY vodka - for people who want purer vodka.
To the others that missed it - thanks for trying. Good luck next time and remember, yougottabeinittowinit.
The now famous 2oceansvibe silhouette game! [permalink]
What a wonderful start to the week! I slept most of the weekend and dreamt I was in Las Vegas. The dream was complete with the concrete 2-star cactus infested motel, as well as a casino of sorts. But enough about my nocturnal meanderings, this week is going to kick off with the famous 2oceansvibe silhouette competition!
Below is a picture taken last week from the comfort of Caprice in Camps Bay. Who is the famous South African personality?The Boyes family should find this particularly easy.
Doesn't use a condom, just "broekies sex" [permalink]
Some of you may have read the article in last weekend's Sunday Times about the uprage (outrage combined with uproar) about a porn video that had surfaced on the so called "internet" with Disney characters banging each other with their costumes on.
Obviously I managed to find the video on the internet and I think it's pretty funny. Mr Snowman pumps Minnie Mouse a bit (can't blame him when she is wearing such a fetching polka-dot outfit). Then Goofy bangs one of the chipmunks, followed by Minnie Mouse (after Snowman has already had his way with her - sies!).
The most sexually provoking team- The Teazers 78's touch side [permalink]
I don't know if Tatiana and Bianka are forming a team for Mavericks, but for now Teazers have raised the bar and produced a touch rugby side that has the other strip clubs trembling in their, er, G-strings. Ladies and Gentlemen, allow me to introduce the Teazers 78's touch rugby side...
Bottom right - clearly the man to beat
Why the "78's", you ask?
If I may (from one Barry H):
Let me introduce to you the Teazers 78’s touch side …..not the youngest, prettiest and definitely not the fastest touch side about……. but quite easily the peoples favourite and best drinking side and best dressed team in the league….our results on field have been woeful but it's in the pub where these guys really are a cut above the rest. Regular team/sponsor evenings are also mandatory!
The 78’s bit is because 22% of all men statistically have gay thoughts ……….therefore we all form part of the other 78%.
We are arranging for some of our sponsors to assist with rub downs and cheerleading duties shortly…. will be an interesting night down at Villagers for sure!!
Well, thanks for that, Barry H, we now have full insight into the animal that is the Teazers 78's. It is quite obvious that these guys have something more than just good, fast paced rugger, to offer. These kids have sex appeal, and a strip club's backing to boot! Scuze the pun.
I received this from my buddy Al at the Planet Bar at the Mount Nelson. It seems this character is running around town pulling various scams on bars, restaurants and hotels. His latest caper was at the Planet Bar where he pulled a HELLUVA story out his arse. Our boy told the staff that he was waiting for his brother to arrive with R200,000 which they'll be using for a good time. He claims his brother just won $15million (classic stuff). He used a similar story at The Bay Hotel.
Apparently the little beaut has been staying at hotels and then leaving without paying. He has been arrested a couple of times but is currently at large, as it were.
Mm mm mm - enjoy the village, my love. Play nicely.
Here are some pics taken of him the other night.
He looks so trustworthy.
And clean.
Can you look after my kids for a moment, nice man?
In one of our most up close and personal sightings yet [permalink]
They just keep on coming in! It seems the TBG certainly (obviously) did make an impact at the Rocking the Daisies festival a couple of weeks ago. And the quality of the footage we are receiving is something QUITE astounding. So VERY up close and personal.
The following from Mike N:
Well I’m sure you will get a kick out of this! These girls in my office were going thru their photos of themselves at RTD concert (I didn’t go so I was especially interested) then all of a sudden...
WHAM!!!!
TBG all over the place!
I shriek’’ OMG! You partied with TBG!!’’ and they were oblivious as to who he was. So I told them the legacy of TBG – and offered to send them in for them….
Here we are! PURE MAGIC!.. Enjoy – I know I did!!
Cheers,
Mike
The TBG up close - mind blowing and glowing
Oh my God! Look how INCREDIBLY AMAZING the TBG looks! What can we work out from the look he is giving us? It is so hard to tell. One thing is certain though, he just KNOWS. He knows all the answers! He is so very aware.
And that confident smile! Who wouldn't be confident in the knowledge that they have the power to heal?
And look at his T-shirt - It says "LUCKY" on it!
No, TBG, you are not lucky. WE are lucky. YOU have blessed us and we thank you!
Residents begin to communicate with the world [permalink]
(UPDATE: We have subsequently learnt that these are NOT post-boxes, but actually nearly-finished electronic public lockers! Good heavens! CLICK HERE FOR THEIR WEBSITE. )
I made a WELL overdue visit to Clifton 4th each on Sunday with The Roofer. There was life-changing wind all over Cape Town but people seemed to forget about the magic of Clifton 4th beach. People seemed to forget that there is a very good reason why people pay up to (and including) R28million for a little house on Clifton 4th beach - it generally laughs at Cape Town's powerful South-Easter wind. Weather buffs will be insistent that I mention that this wind is known as the "Cape Doctor" - a concept that was satirised with the now-famous Ape Town range of T-shirts that have taken most of the earth by storm (unintentional).
[I am temporarily distracted by the new Trellidor commercial which features the company's MD standing behind an actual Trellidor as it protects him from a large ball swung by a crane directly at him. That's a little bit over the top, guys.]
The biggest change I noticed on 4th beach was that the residents seem to have constructed a nuclear-attack-proof post box station. I don't know who they commissioned to build that puppy but it looks pretty fucking serious.
4th beach post boxes- now able to receive bombs
Perv through the middle as you pretend to get your post
So now, not only can you enjoy the dream living and laughing on Clifton 4th beach, but you can communicate with the world as well! The highly sough-after lifestyle that holidaymakers have long enjoyed (check out these gorgeous Clifton holiday rentals) is making a lot of sense.
Look, sure, how can we live it large in the paradise of 4th beach when the screams of victims permeate the air in other parts of the country? That is a fair comment, but, let's be honest, I doubt you'll hear a thing over the noise of the Veuve Clicquot popping on the verandah.
Mazel, mazel - good things. (with a rub of the ear lobe)
These shots of Pink were taken ages ago by Bryan Adams. Yes, Bryan Adams the musician. I know.....weird. But it's true. This is the first of the Tuesday Tabs series that may or may not be continued.
Now, in terms of the actual tabs in question, I don't mind them at all. I've seen duplicates of these guys before and I enjoyed them. So, to the girls out there, if you've got tabs like Pink, we're absolutely FINE with them!
Photo from the power station proves Springfield is a carbon copy [permalink]
You've always thought the inhabitants of Cape Town reminded you of people from The Simpsons animated TV show, but now you have proof that the it was inspired by Cape Town.
One of our readers found himself at the top of one of the cooling towers and sent in this unconventional pic of Tableau Mountain. Below I have put a pic of the Springfield power station to show the similarity.
Geniet dit.
So THAT'S what it looks like from the other side
The Simpsons, found inspiration in Cape Town
thanks mark
Seth Rotherham
Editor
2oceansvibe.com [permalink]
Looks like we have a classic on our hands [permalink]
Anna's emails generally require some quiet time to go through as she is prone to really getting into it. But yesterday I received a one-liner email from her with a link, telling me about a video of her boyfriend and his mates dealing with a customs official on their way back from Botswana - COMPLETELY HAMMERED.
I doubted that it was THAT funny and didn't watch it until this morning. I was wrong. It is one of the funnier clips I have seen in a while. Please enjoy this clip as the boys serenade the customs official with 'That Loving Feeling' a la Top Gun. Keep an eye on our boy hiding below the counter, jumping up when it is his turn to sing. Then the customs woman smacks him in the face with a passport. Beautiful.
Enjoy the fishing rods. Enjoy the shirts they're wearing. It's too much. That's what makes this country beautiful. Can you imagine this happening at customs in the States? Whaaah! They'd be shot on site.
