2oceans Vibe

In an exclusive interview with 2oceansvibe, the CEO of South Africa’s 2010 FIFA World Cup Organising Committee, Danny Jordaan has revealed today that the SA World Cup’s financial statements support the tournament’s perceived success.

Jordaan confirmed, “In today’s forthcoming AGM, the Operations Report and Financial Report will confirm that the SA World Cup shows a total revenue of $4.2 billion.”

While South Africa definitely scored from the World’s biggest sporting event, the FIFA coffers are looking pretty tidy as well, as Jordaan went on to reveal unprecedented reserves. “FIFA reserves now show an amount of $1 billion. This is a position that FIFA has never been in before,” said Jordaan, who is also a member of FIFA’s Marketing Board.

Danny Jordaan went on to say that there was a lot of work to be done on the African continent and wants to see what contribution he could make to African football.

The man who delivered South Africa the most successful World Cup ever, dodged questions about his candidacy for the top job and, when pressed as to whether or not he would ever put his name forward, Jordaan replied, “That may be a question for the future, but right now I am focused on African football!”

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Do you remember the name Larissa Riquelme? You should do – she was quite possibly the most famous supporter during the 2010 World Cup.

She also happens to be a lingerie model.

Funny that..

Larissa Riquelme – Paraguay’s most passionate supporter

Larissa promised to strip naked if Paraguay won the World Cup and, as you might recall, they didn’t win.

But that doesn’t stop her from being a good sport!

Miss Riquelme has done the right thing and celebrated her body in a recent pictorial which is just perfect for Tuesday Tabs.

Follow the link to check it out!

A friendly warning to those of you who are offended by the human body and/or those of you working for employers who abuse you and treat you like children – the following images are “NSFW.”

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The North Korean football team, along with it’s entire complement of staff, were recently subjected to a “grand debate”, to discuss the tender matter of their ideological betrayal of their nation.

The players were hoofed up on stage, and the big daddys spanked them for about six hours.

I was actually there at the time. Kim invited Seth to award a few coal mining scholarships to toddlers with promising-looking hands, but he was unavailable, so I stepped into the breach.

I didn’t actually realise that this particular part of the programme was coordinated mass humiliation, though.

CLICK HERE for righteous anger

Seth posted this footage of a man allegedly trying to steal the World Cup (that’s right, the trophy) at the 2010 Fifa World Cup final at Soccer City on July 11.

Some of you were kind enough to point out that “a man” was actually Jimmy Jump, a 34 year old professional pitch invader and downright flamboyant Spaniard.

Jimmy Jump’s real name is Juame Marquet Cot, and apparently his main intention was to place a barretina on the shiny scalp of the trophy – the red beany-like hat is a spanish symbol of freedom, liberty, and presumably, naked running.

What’s more, all indications are that this last stunt was Jimmy’s final Jump, and he’s hanging up his barretina for good.

With that in mind, please enjoy an overview of Jimmy’s illustrious jumping career.

CLICK HERE for the jump (get it?)

Love him or hate him, but mostly hate him, Sepp Blatter was the lucky recipient of the Order of the Companions of OR Tambo, bestowed upon his reverend person by the magnanimous nation of South Africa.

Well, alright then. You diplomats brown nose each other in whichever way you prefer.

But, oh sweet heavens, how were we so lucky to deserve this?

Wikipedia vandals and a lazy South African presidency clerk have unwittingly conspired to officially list Sepp Blatter as “dickhead”.

Seriously.

I’ll tell you how.

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I heard about this around town but couldn’t find any footage of it – you know, the story about the guy who ran across the pitch before the start of the World Cup final. So instead of finding it myself, the footage found me! In the form of an email from 2oceansviber, Chris V.

[Everybody] “Thanks Chris!”

Madman runs to steal the World Cup – but does he make it?

The guy got an elbow to the jaw – but did he manage to get his hands on the thing before?

Were the officials quick enough to stop him?

All will be revealed!

Check out the footage after the jump:

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We’ve debated it, we’ve dealt with it, we’ve heard that it’s really bad for your hearing (well, we actually read that, we’re completely void to the world of sound now). Hell, we’ve exported it to the world.

There is only one last thing to ask of the vuvuzela.

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Shock Decision – Paul The Octopus Picks Spain

Paul The Octopus STUNS Germany And Picks Spain To Win Semifinals – Paul, a brilliant German octopus, has impressed fans worldwide with his uncanny ability to correctly predict the outcome of Germany’s World Cup games. Most recently, the omniscient octopus selected the Germans to beat favored Argentina. He was right again, improving his track record to an unbelievable five for five. [huffers]

Netherlands Pip The Hand-Ball Kings - The Netherlands will face either Spain or Germany in the Final of the 2010 FIFA World Cup South Africa™ after beating Uruguay by the odd goal in five in the first of the tournament’s semi-finals at Cape Town’s Green Point Stadium. Bert van Marwijk’s side were worthy of their victory but were made to work hard for it in an eventful last four encounter punctuated by excellent goals. [fifa]

Mel Gibson’s Has Some Bad Photos To Add To Those Audio Tapes - Oksana Grigorieva not only has Mad Mel’s vile and profane rants on tape, but she is also sitting on potentially explosive photos that will show her bloodied and bruised after a confrontation with the Oscar-winner, according to a close confidante. Grigorieva apparently received two black eyes and had two front teeth knocked out. Charming. [radar]

Caster Semenya Is A Woman! – Caster Semenya was cleared to immediately return to track by the sport’s governing body Tuesday, ending an 11-month layoff while she underwent gender tests after becoming the 800-meter world champion. Semenya is allowed to keep running as a woman, although it is unclear if she has had any medical procedure or treatment during her time away. Welcome back…babe! [associated]

Lindsay Lohan Is Going To Jail For 90 Days – Lindsay Lohan was sentenced to 90 days in jail yesterday, followed by a 90-day in-patient rehab program for violating probation on a previous DUI case. Lohan broke down in tears as Judge Marsha Revel revealed her decision. Lohan must surrender to the court on July 20 at 8:30am to begin serving her time. Her mother tuned reporters that “This is so not fair to do this to my child.” [popeater]

The Queen Wears Crystal-Studded 3D Glasses - Queen Elizabeth II has become the highest-ranking dignitary to be photographed in 3D glasses. She wore the 3D glasses for a demonstration of film technology during a visit to studios in Toronto, Canada. The Queen brought her own customised set with Swarovski crystals forming the letter Q on the sides. [luxuo]

Bomb Scare At The Waterfront - A part of the crowded V&A Waterfront in Cape Town was cordoned off on Tuesday night after two suspicious-looking carry bags were found outside the Mitchell’s Waterfront Brewery. Sniffer dogs were brought in and they decided to destroy the bags in controlled explosions Turns out the bags had books in them. Carelessly, this report does not state what the books were about. [koos]

iTunes And Apple App Store HACKED! - The first signs of trouble happened over the holiday weekend when two app developers noticed their apps in the books category started dropping in the popularity rankings – dramatically. It quickly became obvious that a “farm” of rogue apps were getting some sort of artificial boost. But that isn’t the worst of it, money was disappearing too.. [inc]

Hot Russian Spy Was Obsessed With Princes William & Hazza - Anna Chapman was fixated with princes William and Harry and schemed her way into their social circle. She frequented Boujis, the nightclub haunt of the two young royals, where repeated concerns have been raised about their safety. Now officials at MI5 are urgently investigating whether a security risk was posed by Anna, 28, one of 10 alleged Kremlin spies arrested in the US. [mirror]

Telkom Give Pathetic Argument To Stay With Capped Broadband – In what must be the worst marketing strategy ever conceived in South African history, Telkom has tried to sway internet users away from uncapped packages. The company claimed in their newsletter that uncapped packages are subject to a variety of terms and conditions, and that capped packages represented better value for money. [iafrica]

“King Of All Cars” Tops 267 MPH – The Bugatti Veyron is, once again, the fastest production car on the planet. Bugatti says an orange-and-black Veyron 16.4 Super Sport achieved an average top speed of 267.8 mph at the hands of test driver Pierre Henri Raphanel. Stop and think about that for a moment. That’s more than 393 feet per second and almost 4.5 miles per minute. Even Bugatti’s engineers were surprised. [wired]

Pommie Killer On The Loose, Threatens To Shoot Cops – I should just warn this fellow, Raoul Moat, that everything will end in tears. This, after he shot his ex-girlfriend, killed her boyfriend and then posted Facebook messages up on Facebook, taunting the police and warning them that he wants to take them out. And when I say “take them out,” I don’t mean for a three-course-meal.. [telegraph]

Kendra Talks About Meth Use And Sex With Hugh Hefner – Well if you ever wanted to know what it’s like to make love to an old man, now you have your chance. Kendra Wilkinson is launching a new book called something or other and has, in a live TV interview, disclosed information about her previous meth use and sex with Hef. Wonderful. [jezebel]

[thanks ard, landi]

No spice, the Dutch soccer team needs a place to stay.

While the Uruguayans were getting an undeserved peaceful night’s sleep in Newlands (despite a small Twitter campaign calling for Capetonians to please “not” blow vuvuzelas and bang drums outside their rooms), the dutchies were bumming around the Cape of Good Hope looking for a place to stay after Dutch team management underestimated the team’s progress in the tournament.

The Dutch Football Association (KNVB) only made reservations in Johannesburg’s Sandton Hilton hotel up until July 5 – and their home from home is now fully booked.

Keep reading if you’re feeling charitable.

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I got this video clip from a reader. It looks pretty real but I don’t recognise which stadium it is.

Is that Cape town?

Were you there? Does anyone know anything about this?

You can see the plane flying off at the end. Did you catch that?

[thanks reese]

National Geographic doing things properly..

CLICK PIC TO ENLARGE

Nice guys… REAL nice.

[thanks craig]

Amazon sales of the vuvuzela have increased 1000% – did you know that? But that’s not all – The first vuvuzela was blown in Camps Bay by Christian Stewart in the late 50′s – did you know that?

Ok, I was kidding about one of those statements. But which one is it? Check out the vibe below and find out.

Well done, vuvuzela data mining people.

I enjoyed “An Inevitable Production” at the bottom.

[thanks clinton]

You gotta give the Dutch credit – they certainly get A for effort in the fandom stakes. I’ve received a tumultuous load of emails with these pics and didn’t know where to start. Luckily I found a fellow blogger, blacknotes.co.za had done the necessary.

Seriously – that’s nothing..

Crazy cars – crazy people..

Check it out:

What is 6km long and Orange? Led by an Orange double-decker the Dutch Supporters on route from their camp site in Pretoria to their next game against Japan in Durban.Their convoy travelled the 636 km route comprising of 175 campers, trucks, busses and jeeps – their convoy was 6 kms long.

[click here for the rest of the story and CRAZY pics!]

Aah, the Dutch.. what a treat! And thank you for throwing in the SA flags!

Good job, guys – and good luck!

BEST.WORLD.CUP.EVER!

[thanks wes]

Remember the time when you were talking to that perfectly normal friend-of-a-friend at a braai? He was into futures trading or whatever, and didn’t have any abnormal ticks of any kind. A totally enjoyable human being.

And then, WHAM, he tells you he’s crazy about Lego. Thirty years old, and still clinging to Lego.

You judged him, didn’t you? I know I judged him. Well, now we both feel like tools, because 19-year-old German, Fabian Moritz, just made Lego un-frikkin-believable.

Please, enjoy the Soccer World Cup 2010 in Lego, stop-motion animation style. That’s right. You can watch highlights of the last match in LEGO.

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